Crazy Adventures in Parenting

33-34 Weeks {Sonogram} Houston, We Have Feet!

2012-01-27T16:30:00.004-06:00

Monday's photo

I had a doctor's appointment today, and the baby proved to be sufficiently stubborn on many levels. Firstly, we found out the baby is breech. Footling breech, to be exact, with a splash of transverse for good measure. Picture the baby chillin' inside me like this:

So, the baby is not particularly playing nice at the moment. I've already been Googling and conferring with close friends, and it seems acupuncture, chiropractic care, and homeopathy are on deck to try, to include crazy upside-down embarrassment-inducing poses in attempts to flip the stubborn baby before next week's appointment. If, the baby is not turned by next week, my doctor will then schedule me for an external version to turn the baby herself. I have heard about how painful this technique is, and so, I am more than willing to try anything before getting to that point. (Y'know?)

Secondly, as if the above wasn't enough drama, the baby didn't want to show it's face during the sonogram. We saw lots of beating heart and kidney and spine action. We saw the top of the head (measuring big, oy!), and the bladder-kicking-future-soccer-playing feet, but no face, no profile, no hands. Also, the sonographer pointed out that the baby was being MORE THAN GENEROUS in trying to show us it's 'parts' today. I may have noticed that, but really, with the baby flailing around, and body parts and organs of all kinds swirling around on-screen, I can't really be sure of what I saw. (Or didn't see, as it were. Ahem.)

Proving to be a difficult one, and he/she isn't even here yet. Hmm..

I was able to find a place locally that offers 3D/4D ultrasounds, though. Hoping to get one done before we give birth, since the kids couldn't come with today, anyway.

Doctor's office pics

Otherwise, I'm feeling okay; a little beached-whale-ish, a little tired, and in desperate need to find a comfortable sleep position, but otherwise, I feel good. Just READY. Heh.

Baby bump progression thus far:

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Kid-Friendly Cheeseburger Casserole

2012-01-26T07:00:00.002-06:00

She's not the prettiest thing on the plate, but she sure tastes goooood!

Once upon a time, I was a kid and my mom ordered one of those old recipe card sets from a cut-out in a magazine. You remember those? For $9.95 and a self-addressed stamped envelope, you could own you're very own recipe collection, mailed right to your door! Who needed informercials or ads on the intrawebs, right?

One of the favorite recipes from the circa 1971 Betty Crocker card collection was "Toasty Cheese Bake" - essentially browned beef with cheese, egg, set in a casserole pan with spices and toast. Ridiculously easy, and ridiculously good.

See? Hella old.

Today, though, not only do I have to make at least double what the recipe calls for, I choose to make it healthier, using ground turkey in along with lean ground beef, using whole grain healthy bread, while adding more vegetables to it. Plus, the add-ons you can do for yourself are unreal.

Keep in mind, the original recipe is for a square casserole pan, utilizing only eight pieces of bread, serving 4-6. My gigantor family with eleventy-billion kids, however, requires double, and so the recipe reflects that below.

Cheeseburger Casserole "Toasty Cheese Bake"
Makes two 9x13 casserole dishes, serving 8-10 people.
Adapted from the 1971 Betty Crocker Recipe Collection

16 (ish)* slices bread (whole grain works REAL well)
organic butter (we use Organic Smart Balance with Flax)
1 lb lean ground beef, browned
1 lb ground turkey, browned
1/2 cup chopped celery**
2+ tablespoons yellow mustard
2 cups all-natural shredded cheddar cheese (we used the thick cut)
2 (ish)* organic eggs, beaten
2 (ish)* cups 1% organic milk
1 teaspoon dry mustard (powder)
1 teaspoon chopped (or minced) garlic
salt, pepper, garlic powder, onion powder, Mrs Dash table blend, celery seed to taste

*These ingredients you may need more of, keep handy in case you do.
**You can omit celery, and/or add other vegetables, such as carrots, peppers, tomatoes, (ones that work well on a burger, for instance) etc.

Heat oven to 350 degrees. Toast your bread lightly and spray both 9x13 casserole pans with cooking spray. As your bread finishes toasting, butter each piece both sides, and lay a layer in the bottom of your casserole pan. You may need to cut to make them fit. Cutting and puzzle-piecing together, Tetris-style is A-OK.

Once meat is browned, drain it, then stir in the chopped onion, celery, mustard, garlic (and any additional vegetables you desire) with chosen seasonings and saute a couple minutes until the onion is soft. Try not to eat from the spatula as you stir, I know it's tempting.

In a bowl, whisk together the egg, milk, and some seasonings, place it inside an easily pourable measuring cup and set aside.

(You can choose to follow the following simple trick of ensuring enough meat is in both casseroles, or ignore and do you're own thing.) Draw a "line" in the skillet of meat, dividing it by halving it evenly. Draw another line across, separating the cooked meat mixture into four equal sections. Each section will now become a layer in the two casserole dishes. (See how that works! Math! Fractions! At work!) Place a layer of meat on top of the buttered toast, and a layer of cheese. Season a little.

Place a new layer of buttered toast over top, followed by a layer of beef, then cheese again. Season a little again. Do not eat anything yet, don't spoil it!

Pour the egg milk mixture over top both casseroles, being careful to pay attention to how much you are using on each. (Here's why it's important to pour from the measuring cup, and why I mentioned potentially needing more egg/milk mixture.) If, after pouring, it seems to dry and not covered enough, feel free to beat at additional egg and 3/4 cup of milk to pour until you feel it's completely covered nicely. This egg/milk mixture is the "glue" to this casserole that keeps it together, and helps make it super-dee-duper yummy. I like to make sure all the crusts are covered nicely, and that it seems to set all the ingredients together well. Once poured, spray your foil with cooking spray (so it won't stick), cover, and place it into the oven for at least 40 minutes to cook. Turn your oven light on so you can peek, especially if your casserole dish is see-through like mine.

In the meantime, you get to agonizingly sit and wait and smell the deliciousness coming from your oven, trying to mask the stomach growls while you pant incessantly while watching the timer. It's okay, it's almost done. You won't die from hunger. Promise. But! Don't forget to prepare some vegetables as a side dish while you're waiting. After the timer dings and when you are sure the egg is fully cooked through, and the casserole is nice and bubbly with steam coming from the center and not mushy, you can remove the cover for a couple minutes to help the top brown, but it's not necessary, but it makes it look prettier (cheeseburger anything isn't exactly the prettiest, but it's so dang good).

Slice 'n serve, baby. Slice. And. Serve.

What do you think? Is this modernized 1970's budget casserole something that your family might like?

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Toddler Gigantor Nerf Gun War

2012-01-25T12:45:00.001-06:00

There is no doubt that he's all boy. He may show interest in brushing my hair, putting lotion on me, and regularly chimes in on wanting his nails painted, too, when I paint his sisters. But this Baby Dude boy is all boy.

Trucks. Power Rangers. Ninjas. Pretend guns and swords. "Pew pew pew!" he calls out with the guns that don't make sound, and oh, the poses!

Rough 'n tough boy, all around. He took the biggest, badded Nerf gun he could find to come "get me."

Nevermind the gun was bigger than HE was. Good gravy!

"Are you sure you can hold that one, baby?"

"Yeah, I dot it." He says, maneuvering it, mouth agape, trying to sling it around and to the side to aim.

"Gotchyu, mommy!"

Oh, yes you 'got' me, baby. In so many more ways than just one.

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

How to Make Yarn Flowers

2012-01-24T12:41:00.004-06:00

I'm one of those macaroni necklace wearing moms. I would love to own tons of pretty jewelry, but it's the sentimental stuff that really gets to my heart. I also love wearing stuff that has meaning behind it, a history, if you will. I adore supporting mom-made stuff, too (so, as you can imagine, Etsy is quite a treasure to me). But making stuff with my kids, and for my kids, means a great deal to me, too.

After making that knitted hat a couple weeks ago, I was on the look-out for a flower to put on top or match it (like a pin). I'll be the first to admit, while I can crochet and knit, I'm still not that great at it, and often times I mis-count and my creations don't come out as intended (I'm still learning). I was looking for a yarn flower tutorial that was easy to do and would come out as intended without so much fuss. Desperate to make flowers RIGHT NOW in this nesting/crafting stage of my pregnancy, I found a different, yet easier route: I purchased a flower loom at Hobby Lobby (with a 40% off coupon), and, after looking at their yarn flower inspiration packet, I went flower-making nuts, yo! Woohoo!

See? After making a ton of flowers, I put them all onto a necklace

I dabbled in sizes and different yarns, too. I spent days surrounded by yarn of all kinds, making flowers to my heart's content while playing with the kids and watching TV. I experimented making barrettes, pins, and even dabbled in a couple yarn flower necklaces, too (tutorial to come soon).

A simple three-flower necklace and barrette for my Baby Sis

After looping and darning until my heart's content, I discovered I could make the flowers even fancier by single crocheting the flower loops around the outside, like this:

Are they not GORGEOUS!?

Notes:

When making a pin, use a larger pin and wrap yarn around it, affixing it to the back of your flower to secure them by tying to the flower with extra yarn.
Same goes with barrettes, get the snappy metal ones, wrap one side in yarn to glue to the flower (or tie), but do not use hot glue or crazy glue, it heats the metal and warps the barrettes so that they won't close properly.
When creating a square or hexagon and crocheting outside, chain extra at the corners to create the point-shape; three extra for squares, two for the hexagon.
Thinner yarn works better for the outside chain than thicker yarn does.
For double and triple stacked flowers, you do not need to darn in between each loop.

I am seriously addicted to making these. I find that thicker yarn comes out much better than the thinner, holding up better. I can't wait to buy more colors.

Do you like what I made? Want me to make you one? Leave a comment below, from now until January 28th at 9pm CST, and I'll randomly pick two people to win a flower of their choice, made out of the yarn I have on hand (colors you see above). :)

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Kids Sleep Anywhere, The "Baby Dude is Everywhere" Edition

2012-01-23T11:14:00.002-06:00

After a long, hard day of playing outside, with all that fresh air he enjoyed, he fell out early one night. Disrupting his beauty sleep enough simply changing his diaper, we lovingly put him to bed, (our king-sized bed, mind you), and he TOOK OVER. He's the littlest one (until the new baby is born) and he is, by far, the biggest contortionist of them all.

And just when he shifts, and you think you'll be able to lay down, he strikes again.

Even poor teddy bear friends are no match for the sleeping Baby Dude. You're not something to cuddle, you're MY PILLOW, pal!

Oh boy!

(If you haven't noticed, my kids have a knack for this sleeping anywhere business. Check out more hilarious photos by browsing my kids sleep anywhere series!)

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

The Morning Surprise (aka Ways to Jolt Your Pregnant Mother into Hyper-Mode)

2012-01-20T09:33:00.018-06:00

This "What the Heck!?" moment is brought to you today by the letters W- T- F, and the number 7 (for my seven-year-old).

It never fails. The day my husband absolutely has to be at work super-ridiculously early for a PT Test, I get the ~~best~~ ~~worst~~ most-effective wake-up call first thing in the morning. My sleepy-eyed second-grader rolls over when I waken him, eyes opening much easier this morning than others, usually. "Mommy? I have to be at school early today."

"Early? Huh? Why?" (Monosyllabic, singular responses, because it's early and mom is only capable of caveman-esque grunts.)

"Because I have to do the announcements this morning."

"Say WHAT!?" (She has awoken. Two words strung together, now. Pitch heightened.)

"I have to.."

"What TIME do you have to be there?" (REDCON 1 awake. That's a full sentence on a couple sips of coffee, folks.)

"I don't know..."

Hard to imagine this 33-week pregnant butt springing into action, but that's exactly what happened. My oldest son calls out to align the troops, "Guys! We have to put it in hyper-gear this morning! Super M has to be at school early for the announcements!"

And, just like that, the blur and eye crust hadn't even been removed from my eyes yet, and my children were moving as if on fast-forward. Hurried shuffling of bowls and milk and jingle-jangling silverware and pans and whisking eggs while I snag backpacks to sign folders, make drinks, toss out medicine and vitamins like bird feed while taking moments to slurp on huge gulps of coffee trying to make sense of the frenetic morning.

We succeeded.

My oldest stayed in the car with the two very sleepy-headed littles while I accompanied him into the school. "Hi, my son has to do the announcements this morning? Where does he need to go?"

"Oh! Well, usually, they just get called from their class."

My son chimes in, "Yeah, I have to go to my teacher. They'll call me down."

Inside my head, I'm screaming, WHY DID I WALK YOU IN WITH MY CAMERA, THEN!? Outside, I'm smiling, jovial, gritting my teeth as I joke about how I thought I might be able to snap a pre-picture of him since I can't stay. And before I could even ask him to make his way over there for me, he was gone.

HE WENT TO CLASS!

No, "Goodbye, mom."
No, "I love you."
No, "Thanks for rushing your tired pregnant ass so fast for me this morning, I appreciate you. You're the best mom in the world!"
(Ha! Yeah right! Wishful thinking..)

Instead, I saw the dust cloud he left in his wake, this full-bellied child scurrying off, with wetted hair to rejuvenate his curls flattened by sleep, his Transformers backpack slung across his back, a mere blur moving in the distance.

I pointed to him, silently implying his audaciousness with a single, wounded-yet-evil-mom-eyes type-of look to the secretary, who just laughed.

"I love you. Have a good day.." I whispered to myself as I walked out, crestfallen I missed out on the opportunity to commemorate the day, and without my goodbye hug, but so grateful for my children, who truly pulled together a home-run in the ninth inning when our family needed one.

Goodbye hug or not, I am proud. Proud of him, proud of us, proud of the tired I feel right now, in the aftermath, where the adrenaline has worn off, and the rest of my day is ahead of me.

I think I shall celebrate with a well-deserved nap. And an extra hug from him to make-up for the one I missed out on.

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Join the Internet Blackout. Stop Censorship. Stop SOPA/PIPA.

2012-01-18T12:18:00.007-06:00

You may have noticed a black bar on the top of my website today, as well as my avatar on my Twitter & Facebook accounts depicting black tape over my mouth.

Today, January 18th, the internet is being "blacked out" to lend support to the STOP SOPA/PIPA movement (SOPA=Stop Online Piracy Act. PIPA= Protect IP Act). If these damaging "anti-piracy" bills are passed, would censor the free internet as you know it. Your Facebook, Twitter, YouTube, favorite websites and blogs, all content user-generated as you know it, could and would be censored. Blocked.

Google has a quick, succinct and easy way to help you contact Congress and let them know your vote is NO. Or, watch these videos for more information about what SOPA/PIPA can mean for the internet, small businesses, social networking, and much more.

Do you have a website and want to support this blackout, too? Add the following code to your header to get a bar like mine:

Replace xyz with the width value of your header, masthead or website (i.e. 1100px).

Use Picnik.com to edit your avatar to add text to say "STOP SOPA & PIPA" like I did.

Visit americancensorship.org to find out what you can do to help stop SOPA and PIPA from happening.

Image courtesy of AmericanCensorship.org

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Big Families Laundry Jenga - When Folded Laundry Towers Over Your Kids

2012-01-17T16:09:00.004-06:00

This is what happens when one mom-of-many gets a little too carried away in the ignoring laundry department. Oy! Shockingly, yes, the following pictures depict is the actual amount of laundry that was done by me, Lisa Douglas, yesterday during the day/evening/night.

By sundown, after doing four loads of darks and one large load of whites, it towered over Baby Dude.

Soon thereafter, one gigantic load of reds/pinks/oranges made the Laundry Tower 'o Doom loom menacingly over Baby Sis' head once folded and added.

I mentioned at the dinner table how grateful I was that the load in the dryer was the last load. My oldest son quickly scooted upstairs and brought down to me the evilest of gifts - his laundry basket, chock-filled with all his school clothes from last week, plus all his play clothes from over the weekend. He, then followed by my middle daughter, who found two day's worth of clothes, filled a sudden, surprise last load I (unhappily) put in the washer. During dinner. Just as I thought I was done.

And when both of the loads came out? It towered over both Super M and my oldest son, Major Spaz.

Soooo, we put the five youngest together, and lo-and-behold? Yup.

IT'S ALMOST TWICE THE SIZE OF BABY DUDE!!! WHOA!!

Thankfully, gathering five of the six kids right there, we were ready to dole 'em out. Hubs and I diligently whittled our way through the gigantic stack, threatening to teeter over at any moment. Hubs originally wanted to play his newly created "Laundry Jenga" game - take out a piece of your clothing from the middle of the stack, and if you don't knock it over, you get to keep said piece of clothing. Of course, he was kidding, but still, we seriously contemplated it after yesterday's war on Mount Washmore.

The finished results - all six kids with their huge stacks of clothes to put away. Mom wins!!

That is.. mom wins until she begins seeing unworn, perfectly clean clothing back in the laundry. Y'know, the "easy" way to put it away - put it back in the laundry! Grrr!

And don't even talk to me about socks. Dude!

How's your laundry pile? Tell me, has it ever been as big as mine? Or bigger?

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Lookie! A Purple Knitting Loom Hat

2012-01-13T16:11:00.003-06:00

I have a thing for purple. With the softest, scrumptious, most delicious purple yarn I could find, I broke out my knitting loom and made this. Lookie!

The above picture didn't get the depth of purple-y-ness, so I held it near a window for you. Unfortunately, it lightened it up a little much. Believe it or not, it's even deeper!

And it's as soft as it looks!

I doubled the thickness, knitting and bringing the original, looping it back in to make it even warmer, even softer. I let a couple rows go single, then knit until I doubled back for the brim area. This was so much fun, I forgot how much fun they are to make!

Now, if you were me, would you add anything on the top of the hat, such as a crocheted flower? Or fuzzy pom? Or would you leave it plain?

(And if you have any wonderful tutorials on fun crocheted flowers, let me know! I'd love to create one, even if I don't put it on the hat, as a pin to match!)

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

A Look at Our Everyday - Toddler Spa for Mom

2012-01-12T13:09:00.004-06:00

I may have a desk tucked away in a corner of my bedroom, but my children are never far from me, ever. We'll do schoolwork while mommy works, or they'll color besides me, if not sitting with me on the chair (that is, before the belly grew). Lately, my kids have taken a shine to playing "beauty school" with me, complete with makeup AND hair do's. They are my best lotion rubber-uppers, my hair brushers and do-ers, my make-up putter-onners. Today I decided to share a bit into our everyday with you.

View of my Desk of Doom™

Despite being expensive powder and brushes, my kids have learned how to use mommy's tools properly. They brush carefully on my face, my arms, my chest (no makeup on there, of course). My daughter pretends she paints my nails with it (been there done that with her before, not revisiting anytime soon). Baby Dude is a really good lotion apply-er on my feet, carefully slathering me up with my night foot cream. He's also learning the fine art of powder dusting, even though there's little-to-no powder on his brush.

This is what's currently to the right side of my Macbook

Baby Sis brushes my hair, applying her hair pretties, a faux lei and her crown. Brushbrushbrush, she poses my head, sits her crown atop my newly done hair.

This is what's currently on the left side.

View from the computer

As she brushed and coiffed on the chair behind me (since my lap has considerably less room than it used to), I turned on Photo Booth and began snapping away. She heard the noise, turned, and instantaneously became a huge dork. (She wasn't the only one. I'm wearing a freakin' crown for crying out loud! Heh.)

Brushbrushbrush

Wait, what? Mom, da camewa's on?

*Insert dorkdom here*

And here...

.. aaaand here...

..still going...

.. but she stops, brushes her own hair, puts her headband back on, and poses for a picture with mommy.

We don't lead the most glamorous life - I'm still in my pajamas, still wiping the sleep from my eyes so she can apply my cheap-o eyeshadow, and the only reason my hair got brushed today was because my toddler did it for me, but I wake up everyday in heaven on Earth because they are lying beside me.

My desk may be a mess, and I'm constantly on the prowl for a good nap, but last night, when I had every kid in the my living room after school, either playing Just Dance 3 or crafting with yarn besides me while I was crafting a hat on the knitting loom, my heart just about leapt from my chest.

My everyday has messes, but it's full of children, of life, and of love. I wouldn't trade a single thing, even those God-awful poopie diapers Baby Dude bestows upon me.

I am blessed, mess and all.

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Out of the Mouth of Babes, Part 16: The Crazy Kid Edition

2012-01-11T10:15:00.002-06:00

{CRASH}

Me: (Calling from the next room) "Uh, what was that noise!?!?"
Baby Sis: "That's just us! We're making a mess, mom!"
Me: ....

(Well, hey, at least their honest about it!)

(It was a metal vase of faux flowers they knocked over playing super-heroes. Metal vase + fake plastic flowers + open concept house = LOUD)

------------------------------------------------------

Baby Sis: "Otay! Nowww we can be brother and sister!"
Me: "Um, baby? You already are brother and sister."
Baby Sis: "No, we're not real brothers and sisters."
Me: "Huh? Yes you are!?"
Baby Sis: "No, NOW we're going to be real brothers and sisters. But fake."
Me: Silence. (Shooting her a puzzled look.)
Baby Sis: "Now we can be fake/real brothers and sisters!"
Baby Dude: "Yay!"

Dude. My brain hurts.

------------------------------------------------------

While cooking breakfast for myself in the kitchen, I hear the two youngest at the table, while eating theirs. A little commotion, and then some giggles.

Baby Dude: "Ow! I hurt my wee-wee!"
Me: "Noo! Stop that!"
Baby Dude: "Him started it!" (Pointing to Baby Sis)
Baby Sis: "Nooo! Her started it!" (Pointing to Baby Dude)
Baby Dude: "Huh?!"
(Both erupt into laughter)
Baby Dude: "I'm Baby Dude. You're Baby Sis. I not a 'her.'"
(Both erupt into laughter again while calling one another the wrong gender, again.)

------------------------------------------------------

Baby Sis: "Can you help me set up my doll house!?"
Super M: "Not right now. YOU'RE NOT MY LAWYER!"

Huh?

------------------------------------------------------

Like these? Catch up on my other "Out of the Mouth of..." posts:

Out of the Mouth of Husbands

Raising a Mini-Me is Wicked Awesome

Out of the Mouth of Babes Part 15, The Marriage and Kids Version

Out of the Mouth of Babes Part 14, The Baby Sis Edition

Out of the Mouth of Babes Part 13

Out of the Mouth of Babes Part 12

Out of the Mouth of Babes Part 11

Out of the Mouth of Babes Part 10

Out of the Mouth of Babes, Part 9

Out of the Mouth of Babes, Part 8

Out of the Mouth of Babes, Part 7, and other Kidlet Cuteness

Out of the Mouth of Babes, Part 6

Out of the Mouth of Babes, Part 5

Out of the Mouth of Babes, Part 4

Out of the Mouth of Babes, Part 3

Out of the Mouth of Babes, Part 2

Haha, Out of the Mouth of Babes

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Carpe-ing the Diem! Seize the Parenting Moments, Good or Bad (and Sleep)!

2012-01-09T12:28:00.001-06:00

Chalk drawing + toddler + messy outfit

I got stuck on a blog post from Momastery the other day, being passed around Facebook in a congratulatory tone, motherly fists in the air in response, except it kind-of hit me the wrong way. I like the author's style of writing, and I can certainly understand her points made, but I wasn't particularly fond of her criticism of those who choose to Carpe Diem as being people who put undue pressure on themselves and others, absolutely having to find positivity in everything. What's wrong with that mentality?

I choose to lead a "glass half-full" kind of life. Sure, you'll see some rants and such here, but usually in a tongue-in-cheek, sarcastic manner, because my philosophy, both on this blog and in life is, "Find the humor in the joy in everything (especially diapers and laundry)." Why? Because it's fleeting. Time stops for no one, and if you don't live, fully, in each moment, bad, fantastic, or in between, you're missing out. You're skating through life. And sometimes, in those no-good, very bad moments, looking at it with a humorous tone, you can get through it, and maybe, just maybe, it isn't so bad as you think it is after all? Or, even if it is that bad, maybe it helps you get through it? And your next moments are just that much more sweeter for it?

Take my last post for instance. It was a bad day. I chose to laugh and find humor at the fact that my day was completely out of whack. Sure, the Charley Horse was no picnic, and having one or both of my toddlers unintentionally kick me in the sore calf while we co-sleep at night is no fun, but damn it, I'm gonna miss co-sleeping with them. I fully admit I am on borrowed time. I'm going to miss their sleep-gymnastics, even if having to wake up at two-am to get my husband to help restructure my daughter, because she's sleeping horizontally across the bed head on me/Baby Dude, and feet draped over my husbands neck like she's Chuck Norris, ninja-kicking him.

I'm going to miss those sleep-gymnastics in the next few months, because, with her acrobatics, she's going to have to move to a big girl bed full time when the baby's born and in bed with us. She's spent five years in bed with us, cuddling us, and those seconds are ticking away closer to the day when that's not the case anymore.

With interrupted sleep or no, I am Carpe-ing the Diem out of this crazy sleep time right now.

Chalky-outfitted toddler + washing the cars + wet rag = fun! And getting clean! (Hey, whatever works, right?!)
Carpe Diem! :)

Speaking of sleep, this morning I awoke with the alarm, a little sluggishly, to the unsuspected surprise of having forgotten to make my coffee in advance the night before. Peering through the slits in my eyes, measuring out coffee I undoubtedly spilled accidentally on the countertop, I was able to get the kids out successfully to be driven to school by my sore-necked husband (see the ninja-kick paragraph before as to why). With my oldest left to catch the bus, and youngest two gymnasts still asleep in my bed, I tucked away my cup of coffee and sat at my laptop for about an hour in the darkness before I felt a pull from the bed behind me, from the cozy, warm, sleeping toddlers, beckoning me in their sleep to come cuddle them some more this morning, despite the work ahead of me and the warmth deliciousness of my coffee. I Carpe'd the heck out of Diem - out of SLEEP - and snuck in a little extra time with them, in rest, in bed. I don't get that chance all that often, and I seized it. With vigor.

Carpe Diem is a phrase meant to inspire you to be sure to be fully in the moment, to be present in what's happening, and go after life, attack it, like a wild animal after its prey. Don't let it pass you by, don't let these parenting moments, good or bad, go by without you bearing witness to them. Live them. Love them. Attack them. Grit your teeth through them. Inhale them knowing they are yours and yours only, that you're living. Know that each will make you stronger, and will teach you something. You don't have to even love every moment. (I mean, who really loves the overabundance of poopie diapers, or cleaning up puke from a sick toddler? Really? But who isn't thankful to be their parent, to be there to help them because they can't do it themselves. Right?)

For each bad there are twice as many good. There's always someone out there who would give their left arm for what you have because, through biology, infertility or more, they can't have what you have. I know it can seem like a pressure to be burdened with, but it's the truth. It doesn't make older folks insensitive who approach you saying to "treasure these times," or "savor these moments," it makes them wise, because they know, all too well, how fast and fleeting time is, how it won't wait for "just a minute" for you to poke your head up from whatever has fascinated you to pay attention. You must always be paying attention.

(Cue ironic interruption) Just this very second, my two little ones came scrambling into the room in hysterics. Before I sat my butt into this chair, again, I made them breakfast and drinks (milk and water), and they chose to play Wii Music before getting dressed to head to the store with me in a bit. Since they finished eating, I've heard nothing by hysterical laughter coming from the next room with a lot of weird sounds. "Mommy!" they both exclaimed, "You have to see this!!!"

My toddler pulled me, he knows that when he wants me nowadays, he has to 'help' me up. Knowing I was close to the end of my writing, I contemplated for a moment whether to get up and see or put it off a couple minutes. But they insisted it was absolutely "uh-larious" and I had to come see now (!!). Even if slightly inconvenient, even if my coffee cup beckoned, and my writing got put on hold, it's why I work from home, for them. And so, my choice was made, and Baby Dude and Baby Sis helped me up. They wowed me with their band-playing skills for a few moments, all while jumping and laughing and pointing.I took a mental snapshot with my mind of their baby smiles, leaning myself against the couch, almost in tears. It might not be the biggest moment ever, inconvenient or no, but it's the small moments that make most of our everyday, and it's those ones I'll miss the most. And if I didn't Carpe Diem, I may have missed it. (End ironic interruption)

I hope to write more of these moments here in the upcoming weeks, months, years, so I can always remember these times with them. I will miss them, dearly, when we're all older and they've moved onto their own lives with their own families; then I'll be the one who will be in a store someday, stricken beyond words when seeing a young mother with young children just being excited about the adventure, a mother who might not want to hear or acknowledge it at the time, but who might actually be grateful for the reminder that her time is fleeting. I liken it to the times, as a child, when your mother would tell you, "You'll see when you get older. You'll learn, someday, that I was right." And, as it turns out, our mothers always were, weren't they?

Besides, even if your toddler is raising holy hell that day, and you're seriously on your last nerve, things could always be worse. It's that silver lining principle you should have in your pocket to see you through life as unscathed as possible. Today they may be a terror, but tomorrow might be a good day (and it probably will); just the fresh start you need. Or it could be the day your life changes beyond your control, like Jen's cousin's did. Or you could be experiencing the miracle of life within you, and what should have been a regular doctor's appointment was no longer, like Arianne's was. Or it may not even be your children at all, it could be your husband taken from you, unexpectedly, like Jennie's was. (Especially being a military wife, with our husbands called off to war, we know better. We live for each moment; we have no idea what can happen next.)

I feel their respective pains deeply, taking it into my heart, knowing no one is guaranteed a charmed life. We were merely given this life, and it's our choice what we make of it. It's with that knowledge I hope to do the best that I can, even if it's not the greatest 100% of the time, because I have no idea what life has in store for me tomorrow, or the next day, or the day after that.

I choose to Carpe Diem the good, the bad, and the everything in-between. What about you?

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

31 Weeks - The "It Took Me All Damn Day to Do This Post" Edition

2012-01-06T19:06:00.005-06:00

It's been a oddball day to say the least. I almost didn't post this belly pic today. In fact, I've been wandering about, meandering through my house today in a strange, almost foul mood. Does that ever happen to you? Where it feels like a full moon, or something? Everything just is "off," completely derailing your perfectly laid out plan for the day, where it's inexplicably nonsensical and almost borderline comical?

It began with my pregnant butt springing out of bed to attention with a horrible Charley Horse in my right calf. I should've known right then today would be a weird one.

Throughout the day, during this episode of complete and utter ridiculousness, it left me all dressed up with no where to go, camera at the ready, wondering, "Should I? Should I post this today? Or should I steer clear of the internet for fear of breaking it, or something?"

And then the power went out. I kid you not! I think it was about that point I seriously contemplated hiding in a closet, or something.

I finally decided, though, when my husband got home, and life ~~finally~~ seemingly quieted down a little, that I would sneak into my master bathroom, snap a quick picture, and find a few silent moments of (what I thought might end up being) alone time to get this photo edited and up and posted. After he got home, it ended up turning into my battling myself (and my family) for over THREE HOURS just to attempt to stay seated in my chair long enough to accomplish said task. D'oh!

Lessons learned:

If you're having an "off" day - just don't even freakin' try. The plan is officially out the proverbial "window."
Your children and husband will come home inexplicably loud. As in, you hear entire conversations, both upstairs and outside, and can recite them back to them (and you do), with cat-like precision, when you reprimand them about their volume level.
Listen to your instincts - go hide in the damn closet, woman.

If ever there were a time to say it, THANK GOD IT'S FRIDAY, YO!

And now, if you don't mind, I'm off to find a corner of the closet I hope to occupy, with my coveted heating pad, until bedtime. Please don't tell my kids I'm playing "hide and seek," though. Okay?

Baby bump progression thus far:

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Princess Doll Cake - The (Almost) Caketastrophe

2012-01-05T12:04:00.005-06:00

Let this post serve more as a warning to you folks attempting to make your own Princess Doll Cake, m'kay?

Note the strategic blurring of the photo around the edges, particularly the bottom. Don't ask what happened to the bottom cake. It wasn't pretty.

First, save yourself some trouble - not every cake needs to be made from scratch. I'm not a big boxed cake fan to begin with, but there are some decent all-natural and organic cake mixes out there you can use. Take my advice, use them. Don't be like us. Frosting and decorating this monstrosity is enough of a hassle without the added torture of baking a cake entirely from scratch added to it.

Second, be sure to follow directions, especially when it concerns the decorative frosting. Y'know, the frosting you're not familiar with using, haven't made in a long time, using all-natural food coloring you've never used before. Yeah. That.

Don't wing it. Read and follow the directions. Completely. And when you get to the part of the directions when it tells you to "let it sit for fifteen minutes" before using it, LET IT SIT FOR FIFTEEN MINUTES. Or else your yellow icing is too drippy to be decorative, and instead of ruffles, you get drips. (See top picture for details.) See how the pinky-white is so much better than the yellow? Yeah. That's because it sat while I ~~messed up~~ did the yellow. *slaps forehead*

Thirdly, if you use a real doll (as we did), and use a batter bowl (like ours from Pampered Chef), the doll's feet will stick out below, requiring the need for a second cake to go underneath. By making a second cake, we were able to thwart the foot dangling issue, but for the love of whatever you consider holy, do yourself a favor, and don't make it look like mine.

(For the doll cake recipe, cooking times and more, go here. And for the doll cake "picks" to use instead of a real doll, to ensure no feet dangling issues, see Wilton's site for a good selection, or your local crafty store, like Joann's.)

Also, allow yourself extra frosting, and make sure you use regular frosting on the intended "frosted" parts (those you plan to frost with a knife or spreader, especially on the second cake) or else, be prepared to smear harder-than-normal frosting on the bottom cake. You'll be left wondering what the H-E-double-hockey-sticks you're doing, and whether you can take pictures of the top part of the cake without getting the bottom, since it's a complete and total disaster area. (See below.) *facepalm*

But in the end, it's actually funny (in an ironic, kind-of way), because the kids actually marveled at the cake. (No really, they did!) "Wow, mom! You made the cake look like her dress!"

(Even if I didn't think it looked that great, it sure did to them. Mostly.)

Besides, it was pretty cathartic to hack into that bad-boy once the singing ceased, the appetites were whetted, and the knife was sharp. After all the pain we'd gone through, and mistakes we'd made, seeing the cake being served, and half gone, gave me a weird accomplished sense of pride (and thankfulness the dang thing still tasted good despite being only semi-okay to look at).

I'll never look at my poor daughter's doll the same again.

(P.S. See more of my #dessertfail posts here. Further proof that mom needs to step away from the kitchen every so often.)

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Reader Survey - Would Love Your Feedback!

2012-01-04T13:00:00.003-06:00

About a month ago, I had a survey here on this blog that asked: "What is it about a blog that makes you want to come back? What prompts you to subscribe or read a blog regularly? Especially if you are particularly busy?"

The answers gave me a lot of insight.

You guys love the funny stuff! (And I do, too!) You also like relating to the author, and you like seeing great pictures. (And I really, really need to work on that picture-taking thing. Ahem.)

I've been thinking a lot about what it is that I do here - where do I want to go? What could I be doing better? What is it that I feel is working? What isn't working? What would I want to see more of/write more about?

But, you see, there's a whole lot of "I's" in the above paragraph. "I" this and "I" that. And while I love sharing and writing and picture-taking and recipe-creating and craft-making, it isn't always about me. You, my reader, come back to read what it is I write and share here, and I'd love to know what you find most fascinating, and what you wish I'd do away with; what you feel I don't do enough of, and what you'd love for me to do that I haven't done yet.

I also have witnessed a few bloggers lately show a disgust for my commenting system, Disqus. Back in '09 when I switched over, I wrote about why I decided to switch. I freakin' love the functionality of it, but am concerned that readers don't like it. I'm particularly interested in your thoughts on that, too.

And so, I created a reader survey. With the design/layout changes coming to this blog this month, I'd love to know your thoughts. This survey is completely anonymous, so you can be as honest as you'd like.

<p>&amp;amp;amp;lt;p&amp;amp;amp;gt;Loading...&amp;amp;amp;lt;/p&amp;amp;amp;gt;</p>

Thank you so much, not only for filling this survey out, but for reading me, for visiting, for sharing in our lives and for being here. I appreciate you!

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Kid-Friendly Craft: Recycled Yarn Cozi

2012-01-04T07:00:00.002-06:00

If you're anything like me, you use toilet paper like it's going out of style. Those paper tubes that are left seem craft-worthy, but what can you make from them? What about a pencil holder?

Or an iPod holder on your desk?

Or maybe a crayon holder for your kids while they color?

Or new handmade napkin holders for when entertaining?

This easy kid-friendly craft is a fun, weaving-type of craft that can yield anything your mind can imagine (that will fit).

Step 1: Cut slats down about halfway. Make them as equi-distant as possible. (You can measure ahead of time if you'd like.)

Step 2: Fold each slat outward, so that it resembles a flower.

Step 3: Tie a knot around one of the slats, with the knot under the slat, as pictured.

Step 4: Wrap the yarn under the next slat, coming through in between, and going backward, looping over the next slat, as pictured.

You'll keep going under-over on each loop, in a clockwise fashion, like so:

Keep looping under-over and keep the loops tight against one another, so that they don't overlap, as pictured.

Keep looping all the way, under-over, until you get to the end.

Step 5: When you get to the last loop on the last slat, cut the string about 3-4 inches away from the last loop, and loop back and under the nearest two threads.

Tie a knot here. Add a dab of crazy glue under the knot, too.

Go back and make a knot in the same way on the previous slat, also gluing it down when you tie it.

Glue down under the remaining slats along the edges so they don't slip off. You can glue down the weaved insides, too. Once it's finished, flip it around, stand it up, and take a look!

Wa-la! A pencil/iPod/crayon/napkin/anything holder! What do you think? Fun, huh?

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

2011 Reflections and Anti-Resolutions for 2012

2012-01-03T12:29:00.007-06:00

n. res·o·lu·tion

1. The state or quality of being resolute; firm determination.

2. A resolving to do something.

3. A course of action determined or decided on.

Last year, I wrote about my New Years anti-resolutions plans on Momicillin, how I didn't feel people should make lists of resolutions of "improvements" they won't keep, and that we should, however, reflect on our previous year of accomplishments with attainable goals to match or improve, coupled with experiencing new things or places. That's my continued goal, anyway. Here's what I originally wrote:

You know, maybe, just maybe, instead of “resolutions” we should have “reflections” – why don’t we look back on the previous year with fondness for what we’ve achieved instead of what we’ve failed?
Here’s mine:
In 2010, with six kids and a jam-packed minivan, we successfully traveled thirteen states for our summer trip, and attended a blogging conference while having one awesomesauce vacation.
In 2010, my children played a myriad of sports, and my oldest son had a perfect football season – they were undefeated. It was his first tackle football season ever.
In 2010, my middle son and I were cleared health-wise for not having cancer. (Talk about something to celebrate!)
In 2010, I survived many times flying parentally solo while my husband had to travel away for Army business.
In 2009, I successfully lost 30 lbs. In 2010, I lost 10 more, taking my total lost to 40lbs. I took my fitness and health by the balls and wrangled that sucker in a full-nelson to the ground. 2011 will be a year I will be in the best health/fitness-level of my life.
In 2010, I was more successful in writing/blogging than any previous year.
In 2010, I was asked to join Momicillin. It’s been happily ever after ever since.

As for 2011 and my anti-resolutions? It’s pretty simple – love my children, love my husband, my family and friends, and to not take anyone or anything for granted. It’s always worked for me, why change it now?

For 2012 I am going to do the same thing; celebrate what we accomplished in 2011 while looking forward to more life experiences and growth in 2012. Here's my list of 2011 reflections and my "anti-resolutions" for 2012.

In 2011, I wrote this post about a dear friend deploying that ended up being honored for the 2011 BlogHer Voices of the Year. It meant a great deal to me to be recognized.
In 2011, I wrote my 1000th post. Here's to one-thousand more!
In 2011, our family went to DisneyWorld, again, for the DisneySMMoms Conference. In 2012, we're hoping to do the same! Also, in 2011, I was a traveling fool, to Nintendo Headquarters in Seattle, to the Mom 2.0 Conference in New Orleans, to BlogHer in San Diego, to Gatorade HQ in Chicago, and much, much more. (Hoping this birth is easy, and I have a good traveling baby like I have had with Baby Dude, so that I can continue this trend!)
In 2011, we bought our first house and moved to San Antonio. (We don't hope to buy again for 2012. Or, y'know, a loooong time after this crazy experience.)
In 2011, we announced baby number seven is on it's way. (Other than this one's arrival in late February/early March, we don't hope to duplicate this for 2012. Or 2013. This is our last baby.)
In 2011, I, again, had a more successful year blogging than I did last year, and did my first TV segment. Woohoo! (And this growth is something I most DEFINITELY hope to smash this again in 2012!)
And, lastly, near the end of 2011, I hired a blog designer to revamp this site. Expect to see major changes this month that I'm really, really excited about.

More "anti-resolutions" for 2012?

Start a couple fun new series on my soon-to-be newly redesigned blog, such as "How Do They Do That?" where we'll detail how we do what we do with so many kids, to include humor-filled posts like, "Out of the Mouth of Husbands" and continue developing "Things That Make Mom Go Batshit"
Continue putting myself out there, blog-wise. I want to grow as a person as well as a writer.
I also want to (finally) learn my camera. 2012 will be the year I will learn all the fancy settings, dangit!
Stay as active as I can through the last weeks of my pregnancy;
Give birth to a beautiful baby boy or girl to complete our family, hopefully having a dream-like birth;
Bounce back as soon as I can after I give birth and get back to kick ass fitness once more, blogging my process along the way for moral support;
Travel more, especially with the family (we're planning an even bigger family road trip this summer);
Continue loving my family like there's no tomorrow, never taking any person or opportunity for granted.

What do you think about New Year's Resolutions? Do they motivate or intimidate you?

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

30 Weeks: The "I Love Maternity Clothes" Edition

2011-12-31T08:00:00.000-06:00

Yeah. I just said "I love maternity clothes." Clothes that actually fit over my (growing) belly and don't make me look like a hick with a beer gut. Amiright?

And, what's even cooler? I have some cutesy ones, too. (Clothes, not hicks with beer guts.) Woo! *high fives self*

I'm particularly proud of these belly shots because I get to show off some really awesome and cute jewelry pieces (and Christmas gifts) I received from hubs. Yay!

I am definitely feeling massively pregnant, and yet, I still have ten weeks to go! Holy crap! I'm still overdoing things, I'm sure, but I have eleventy-billion kids, I'm Italian, I simply don't know how to slow down! You know?

These next ten weeks are going to be challenging, though. Balance has been a tough thing to accomplish (hence the new "balance" bracelet" on my wrist) so we'll see how the start to 2012 and the end of this pregnancy goes.

Baby bump progression thus far:

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Charitable Giving with Champions for Kids SIMPLE Service Projects

2011-12-30T20:31:00.002-06:00

They didn't ask too many questions when I gave them the task to "look for Disney stuff." The only questions each of my children would ask me was, "Is this okay?" when they'd show me what they found. They commanded the job with such authority, navigating aisle after aisle searching for Disney stocking stuffers.

"Do you think this is nice, mommy?" My son asked me.

"Oh yes, baby, I think that'll do just fine."

They didn't seem to mind at all that they weren't getting any of these items for themselves. In fact, they never asked, but it was apparent they knew. Except my almost five-year-old who wanted the Rapunzel stocking we had picked out. "Why are we buying all this Rapunzel stuff, mommy? Is it for me? For my birfday?"

"No, sweetheart. It's for another little girl. A girl who didn't get much for Christmas."

She didn't say much after that. None of the kids did. They now realized the importance of what we were doing and got to work 1000% harder than they did before. Unfortunately, there was lots to find that couldn't be fit into the stockings we were purchasing, so it was hard to say no when their hearts wanted to so badly. We were all wishing it was more than a stocking stuffer celebration.

All our goods on the conveyor at check-out. My goodness, I hope it all fits!

Once we got home, my middle schoolers got to work. They efficiently removed tags and prices and configured the stockings so that all the goodies we purchased would fit properly, shaking the stockings to ensure they could squeeze it all in.

Once they were all finished, they wanted to get back in the car to give their stockings away RIGHT.THEN.AND.THERE. It did my heart proud to see them want to give so badly.

In an earlier post, I told you all about the ways our family were already giving back this holiday season. I was excited to participate this month with Champions for Kids, and I believe we'll be continuing on doing their SIMPLE Service Projects with them monthly.

To remind you, Champions for Kids is trying to mobilize millions of people to help children from within their own community, all over the nation. More than 17-million children in the United States are at risk for hunger. One in five children is poor, with half living in extreme poverty each day, leaving millions of children who do not have the basic resources they need such as eye and dental care; school supplies, warm clothes, and food.

Champions for Kids offers several different programs to get people involved. I've joined them by participating in their SIMPLE Service Projects; a monthly program filled with fun ideas and ways to engage millions of people to improve the health of children in schools across America. This month's SIMPLE mission was a Disney Stocking Stuffer Celebration.

If you're interested in learning more, you can follow Champions for Kids on Twitter or "like' them on Facebook to keep track of all they're up to. If you want to see what others have done for this month's Disney campaign, use the hashtag #DisneyCFK on Twitter to check it out.

What ways have you given back to your community before?

This post has been compensated as part of a sponsored charitable opportunity for Collective Bias.

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

What To Do With That Holiday Money?

2011-12-28T20:00:00.002-06:00

Every year my children are given money and gift cards from grandparents, whether for birthday, holidays, tooth-fairy, report cards, etc. I've discussed how we save our children's money in envelopes at home, to include all gift cards they're given. This year, though, since opening my children's Kidworth accounts, we can now add their kid contributions towards their new savings goals they didn't have before their account creation. Woohoo!

I have to admit this to you: saving my kids' money was awesome enough on it's own. I was proud to see them save. But saving now, with specific goals in mind, makes my heart want to dance. Seriously. This is such an important lesson for children to learn, especially in this day and age, not to mention economy.

With some of the money she's earned from the neighbor for house-sitting/dog-walking, plus Christmas money she's received, we were able to add some funds towards my teenager's car fund.

In the dashboard, it shows how much she's saved and received towards this goal so far.

I asked my children if they wanted me to share their profiles with friends and family, enlisting help from others to help get them to their goals faster, and they said yes! I created an e-card using Kidworth's system, inviting others to view our family's profile page with our kids' individual profiles.

Adding recipients was a snap! So easy!

Once the card is sent, you can share it via social media and other ways, too.

When you click on profile on the e-card, and then visit my son's profile, you can see what he's saving for, and you can see how easy it is to help contribute towards his goal.

How cool is this website?! Even if your children are too young to have specific goals in mind, what if you wanted to start a college fund for them now? You can do that with Kidworth! I think it's pretty genius to get them involved and to have them be more proactive with utilizing goals and saving money.

What do you think? Do you want to help your children start saving towards a goal? What goal are you saving for already, or will you create some new ones?

I'm a Kidworth Ambassador and this post is sponsored by Kidworth

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Christmas and Toys and Presents, OH MY (Does It Have To End?)

2011-12-26T20:20:00.011-06:00

I just spent the last hour being schooled in the way of Beyblades. I learned how to use their ripcords, how to know which Beyblade goes with which launcher, and how to "win."

They are basically tops that spin really fast. Decorated with stickers and some light up and have different "effects," I can't begin to tell you how much it made my son's day to play his new toys with him, and show me "his moves" while we bonded over his "battle station." We opened up every last one he received from us for Christmas, and there, smack in the middle of his bedroom, we ripped it up, Beyblade-style, and laughed. A freakin' lot.

Earlier today, I played tea party with my daughter's new Princess Tea Set that she served on her new Svan table and chair set. It meant a great deal to me to give her a quality table and chair set this year (thank you, Scandinavian Child*), she's now at "that age" where dress-up tea parties, coloring, and play food are all on her daily menu. Now she can do it kid-size instead of at our dining room table.

I also watched the kids on their new bikes we bought for them, riding on the street, as the littler ones rode their new scooters, watching the wheels light up in the dark. We bought the older ones "trickster" bikes this year, with a ramp, along with skate boards and a "grinding" rail (whatever grinding means).

We also spent a fortune (cough, seventy-dollars-OMG, cough) to replace the dead battery in the Power Wheels mustang we own, giving it new life. Baby Dude was livin' it up, learning how to drive it and control it.

I love this time of year, this exhausting day-after where everything is cool, you'll NEVER hear the words "I'm bored" because suddenly there's so much to do. And play. And build. And create.

And where Buzz Light Year pajamas demand a bouncing happy reception:

..and new Power Ranger swords required an immediate opening and test drive:

.. and preteens suddenly realize that mom knows what they like, style-wise, and got them exactly what they wanted. Three new fedoras for dude, and two new newsie hats for dudette:

... and a cool, new leather coat for the teenager. (Hoping this will now give her a reason to actually wear a coat, since before they weren't "cool.")

My back may hurt like hell, my hands with blisters and paper cuts from opening cardboard boxes a-plenty, and I may feel like I've been side-swiped in a car accident with the post-Christmas hangover, but my heart soars spending this time with my kids, having my husband home, and just being a family.

Does it have to end next week? Can't it last forever?

*scichild.com sent me the table and chair set.
Anything else mentioned was purchased myself.

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Wrapapalooza Hilarity

2011-12-24T11:48:00.001-06:00

(Alternately titled: Why We Need Our Own Reality Show)

Hubs and I have ~~suddenly grown a brain~~ decided this year will be *the year* we're not up until 3am wrapping e-v-e-r-y-p-r-e-s-e-n-t for our children. We decided to begin wrapping this afternoon, while the older kids were upstairs playing Risk and the younger two were watching Christmas programs on NOGGIN.

Why do we stay up late wrapping presents, you ask? Simple - we're getting old and forgetful. And we LOVE choreographing the present opening based on recollection. For example - if there are two related gifts (i.e. each of the older kids got Heely's), we like to have them all open it together, at the same time. It's just the added magic to Christmas that hubs and I bring *tiger wink*

But since we're starting earlier this year, we decided to do a "symbol" system. The kids will have to look for matching symbols to open together, so this way we won't rely upon our tired memory, AND we get to get sleep! SCORE! *high five*

Except, there we were, in the middle of finishing up a combo/related present set for the boys, when I ask:

Me: "Where are we at with this one, star-six?"

Hubs: "Yes. Or, as we like to say in Spanish, cuatro y uno."

Me: "Wait. Cuatro y uno?"

Hubs: "Yeah. Cuatro y uno. Uh, which is, you know, one less than seis."

Me: (Hilariously laughing.)

Hubs: "It's a game. Kind-of like Soduko. SHUT UP!"

Me: (Still hilariously laughing.)

Hubs: "DAMMIT, I'm not talking to you anymore."

Me: (Dies on floor hysterically.)

This? This goes on for hours upon hours while we wrap, too. (And? If we can dig out from under wrapping paper, there might be more hilarious conversations posted later. Stay tuned.)

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

29 Weeks Pregnant - The Struggling, Not-Doing-So-Well Edition

2011-12-23T14:43:00.001-06:00

When I had my daughter back in '07, I ended up with a whopping case of PPD. I recall being particularly stressed out and emotional during her pregnancy, too. It seems that's happening during this pregnancy as well.

I may seem uppity and cheerful and chipper and happy, and I sure do try to put on a 'brave face' most of the time, because that's just me and 'how I roll' - I suck it up and power through. Most times? It works. It also usually isn't always a bad day. But when the bad days do indeed hit? Wow.

Despite how round and voluptuous I am, I become FLATTENED, like the pavement.

Perhaps it's the holiday stresses. Or it could be the end-of-pregnancy blues you begin to feel. It could very well be that it's really hitting me hard that this is the last time I'll be pregnant. Or maybe, it's really all of it all rolled into one, and slathered with a healthy helping of pregnancy hormones.

Nonetheless, this final week of Christmas prep has been particularly nightmarish, and my favorite holiday of the year I'm suddenly dreading. And that so, totally, isn't like me at all.

My new favorite pajamas by Moody Mamas.

Today is one of those 'brave face' days. It's the day before Christmas Eve, and there are final preparations to accomplish, and a gift for hubs I've been chasing all over town with no success in finding it thus far. (First ever time in history he's done before I am!)

I'm going to get dressed, step outside in this frigid weather (hello, Texas? What the heck!? 40's, really?), and do my best to get 'er done today, despite my melancholy mood. It is Christmas, after all, and there are six children and a beautiful husband who need me.

Baby bump progression thus far:

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Easy Homemade Beef Stroganoff Recipe

2011-12-22T10:41:00.004-06:00

When we were coming up with what to eat this week, we wanted to eat something a little different, something easy but tasty. Beef Stroganoff was one of those recipes you grew up with as a kid, and immediately both my husband and I knew we had a winner on our hands.

I adapted Paula Deen's Beef Stroganoff recipe and changed it, making it my own, particularly since I don't use canned cream of mushroom soup, and also, because our family is large and more steak and beef broth were needed to make this "properly."

My little helper

The best part about this recipe is, you can have little helpers "help" you cut up the mushrooms, since they are so soft and pliable to begin with. My daughter used a not-sharp "kid's" knife to slice the mushrooms into my Tupperware Quick Chef Pro slicer.

Easy Homemade Beef Stroganoff Recipe

INGREDIENTS:

2 pounds cubed round steak, cut into thin strips
Mrs Dash table blend, garlic powder, onion powder
All-purpose flour
2 tablespoons olive oil
2 tablespoons butter
1 medium onion, minced
8 ounces fresh mushrooms, minced (we used less)
1 (28-ounce) box Swanson All-Natural beef broth (will be used in soup below)
Creamed soup (see below for recipe)
Salt and black pepper
1 cup sour cream
Cooked egg noodles (we used two packages)

Creamed Soup Recipe

3 heaping tbsp butter
4 tbsp flour
1 cup beef broth (from box above)
1 cup of milk
seasoning to taste

DIRECTIONS:

Slice your onions and mushrooms (with a little help, if desired).
On a covered skillet or large frying pan (with a cover), add the olive oil and butter, and brown the steak whole on both sides for a couple minutes each. (This seals in the juices and makes the beef cook tenderly.)
Remove from skillet, slice steak into strips and season with seasonings, and then toss the steak in a bowl with flour until completely coated.
While slicing the steak into strips, add the onion slices and mushrooms to the pan drippings and saute until onion is tender.
For the Cream Soup: In a small sauce pan by melting the butter. Once butter is melted, add the flour, and whisk until blended well and small beads form. Add broth and milk, whisk again, letting simmer until it thickens up. Add seasoning to taste.
Sprinkle the onion and mushrooms with a tablespoon of flour, then placed the floured steak back into the pan with the prepared cream soup and 1 cup of beef broth. Season again.
Stir then cover, cooking over low heat for about 30 minutes.
Every ten minutes or so, add more beef broth, mixing into the thickened gravy mixture, thinning it out a little, and add a dash more seasoning. Should use the remaining broth in the box by the end of the simmering time, to make it more gravy-like.
Once 15 minutes has passed since steak mixture began simmering, begin preparing egg noodles.
Once stroganoff is finished, stir in the sour cream right before you serve, and blend well. Serve over drained and cooked egg noodles.

It made me happy that there were *actual* mushrooms and onions in this dish, and they were cut so small and sauteed so well, the kids had no idea, and ate it all. Yay for hidden veggies!

Look at all that seasoned stroganoff gravy goodness - yum!

My kids lost their minds over this dish. My son wants this for his birthday meal next week. My oldest actually said that this trumps my lasagna, which has not only been her favorite since she was little, has been on her "birthday menu" for years and years. TRUMPS MY LASAGNA! Dude! For this Italian born and raised momma, that's huge!

I'm guessing they really, really, REALLY liked it.

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Giving Back this Holiday Season

2011-12-21T15:43:00.004-06:00

Do you see all those boxes there?

Those Priority Mail boxes moved me to a gigantic puddle of tears. Those boxes are being sent to soldiers overseas this holiday. My children's middle school organized an Adopt-a-Soldier campaign, which ended up becoming Adopt-Many-Soldiers when our schools' families got involved. Every fifth and sixth grader proudly collected items for these boxes to be sent.

Games. Personal care items. Baked goods. Cards.

Sitting atop these packages are customs forms, ready to go, to brighten a soldier's day and let him or her know there's a school in Texas that very much appreciates them and the work they do.

{Cue the hysterical but proud pregnant military wife tears}

It does my heart so good to have been a part of this with my kids, and not just because it's the holiday season. It's these acts of service that I wish to convey to my children regarding the holidays, how this season is so much more than receiving items on a wish list, it's about blessing others and helping one another. It's one of the reasons I love this time of year so much, and it's truly something I wish would last all through the year.

To further share this giving spirit with my children, but in a different way than the usual, I'm participating for the first time in a monthly mission with the group Champions for Kids. Champions for Kids is on a mission to mobilize millions of people to help children from within their own community, all over the nation. More than 17-million children in the United States are at risk for hunger. One in five children is poor, with half living in extreme poverty each day, leaving millions of children who do not have the basic resources they need such as eye and dental care; school supplies, warm clothes, and food.

Champions for Kids offers several different programs to get people involved. I'm joining part of their SIMPLE Service Projects; a monthly program filled with fun ideas and ways to engage millions of people to improve the health of children in schools across America. This month's SIMPLE mission is a Disney Stocking Stuffer Celebration. I'll be sharing what we're doing in a later post.

You can follow Champions for Kids on Twitter or "like' them on Facebook to keep track of all they're up to. To follow this month's Disney campaign on Twitter, use the hashtag #DisneyCFK. I would personally love it if you decided to join me in this SIMPLE mission!

What ways have you given back this holiday season?

This post has been compensated as part of a sponsored charitable opportunity for Collective Bias.

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Letter to My Unborn: Stop Kickin' Me in the Crotch in Public, Yo

2011-12-21T06:00:00.003-06:00

Hey there, baby-person. Mom needs to lay down the law, here. Let's talk, shall we?

I'm not a huge fan of having to go out in public with you right now. You're kind-of being a jerk and ruining Christmas. Yeah, I said it!

When I'm out shopping, navigating the God-forsaken bowels of local retail stores picking up last-minute holiday gift-type items, can you please cease and desist with the kicking in my crotchtal region? You know, the part of my anatomy you're going to be exiting in a couple months, in a very traumatic type-of way? You know that place? Yeah. There.

You see, that part's going to see enough abuse when the time comes, so let's ix-nay on the icking-kay on the agina-vay, okie dokes? Because, not only is it painful when you kick me there, it embarrasses the hell out of me.

You see, when you kick me down there, I immediately grab my lower belly and squint my face like this:

And in squinting my face and grabbing at my belly, as round and voluptuous as it is, the folks around me immediately go into a panic. An Oh My God, that lady's about to drop a freakin' infant out of her vagina! I need to go run in the opposite direction type-of panic.

After a few times of having to go through that in a store, having to thwart the eyes of scared onlookers and aggravated store associates, pissed off about the mere idea of my making a mess delivering a child in their store while they pick up stray products left on the floor from fleeing terrified patrons, I'd rather spare myself that embarrassment and stay at home at not shop for anyone at all anymore.

And, while your dad is cute and a good kisser (yeah, I said it), if I were to leave the things on the list for him to do, we may never see him again. These stores might possibly swallow him whole, and he's cute, and cuddly, and we'd miss him too much.

So kindly stop kicking the crud out of my hoo-ha, and mom can finish shopping, everyone will get Christmas, and it won't be ruined because your soccer kicking abilities in the womb, okay? Okay.

Sincerely,

Your poor, ailing mother

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Why Pregnant Women Shouldn't Play Twister Alone in Their Shower Stall. Ever.

2011-12-20T13:56:00.000-06:00

I truly meant to take a refreshing shower to shed the ickiness of my foul, grinch-like mood. That water faucet hadn't seen such aggression when being turned to the "on" position, I felt almost Schwarzenegger-esque in my efforts to turn the temperature to hot and step inside to the steam.

After lathering and rinsing my in-desperate-need-of-hair-care-products hair a few times, I began lathering up for the ever-awkward shave. I probably could have thought this through a bit better, being eight months pregnant with a Santa-like belly and all, I heaved my leg up onto the side of the shower, without a care in mind, attempting to tuck my belly out of the way to reach my toes and begin my best efforts to shave stray hairs from my shin and not slice and dice my skin.

But between the soap, the steam, and my wobbling pregnant body, I dropped the stupid razor, and when it fell, I felt it's echo onto the shower stall floor though my body. DAMN YOU, YOU STUPID RAZOR! I cussed at it.

Image credit

I released my leg from it's torturously awkward propped-up position, but it, too, hit a patch of foamy soap, causing me to not remain balanced (as if any pregnant woman ever feels that way, ever), simultaneously as I was leaning to reach the razzafrackin' razor, I fell, and landed in a downward-facing dog position.

Except, not graceful, not pretty, and definitely not relaxing.

I realized my ass-cheeks were being pressed against the glass wall, and suddenly, and uncomfortably, I had an audience. "Hi, mommy."

I turn my head to see Baby Dude had been watching my pregnant calisthenics. "I see your butt, mom!"

Gee thanks, dude.

(I will spare you the horror by NOT taking a picture of the smear-marks my ass-cheeks made on the shower wall, which would not only scar you for life, but further my embarrassment in having to admit how wide those bad-boys are. Cuz, y'know, pressing them against glass isn't exactly slimming.)

I bent my knees to get on all fours, picked up the stupid razor, swiping my soaking wet hair out of my face, and got back to a normal, standing position, so I could finish rinsing my hair.

Baby Dude waved to me with a smile. I waved back.

(We won't speak of this again, right dude? Right?)

(P.S. Mom will choose to take baths instead of showers next time, okay? Okay.)

(P.P.S. If you happen to see me with only one partially shaven leg, don't ask, just smile and wave.)

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Easy Teacher Gift Craft "Thanks a Latte" Starbucks Gift Card

2011-12-19T11:43:00.004-06:00

Need an easy-to-make teacher gift to give this holiday? Look no further!

I wanted to give each of my children's FIFTEEN teachers (!!) a gift they could use in a fun and whimsical way. Knowing the popularity of Starbucks nowadays, I thought a "Thanks a Latte" card might be a cute way to present giving the gift of coffee (originally inspired from this post).

You can right-click and save the image above, or download the picture from here (image credit)

I didn't have good card stock to print it on at home, so I decided to have it printed at my local Walgreens on 4x6 paper. It came out BEAUTIFULLY.

I visited my local Starbucks to grab the holiday gift cards and fifteen paper coozies to staple to the card, like this:

Two notes (warnings) here: Firstly, you can decide to cut the coozie, which makes the card less bulky (like I did), but ONLY if you seal the bottom to the card (which I did not). You can seal it either by stapling or glue or using double-sided tape. I didn't do this, because all I had handy was my baby stapler, and it wasn't long enough to reach. I could have kept the coozie together and pre-stapled the bottom to avoid this problem, though - something I didn't think of until it was already done.

Secondly, staple towards the edge more than I did, if you want the gift card to sit width-wise, and not cover up the letters on the card (another something I didn't do properly). I couldn't fit it that way with how close I stapled, which made the card sit as you see below:

Still not bad, though. I just had to be sure the kids held their cards carefully when handing out (if not in an envelope). But, better be safe than sorry, put it into an envelope to give, with or without a holiday card inside. We chose to give a holiday card with it, from our family to the teacher:

Isn't it adorable? I had my children sign their name with permanent marker. I loved the quality of the print and how the coozies added that coffee flair.

Did you make a present for your child's teacher? Or have you ever before?

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

27 & 28 Weeks. 8 Months. HOLY REALITY CHECK, BATMAN!

2011-12-16T08:35:00.002-06:00

As if I wasn't already feeling HUGE and GINORMOUS and BIG AS A HOUSE entering the third trimester, it's when you reach into your once happy closet and pull out a pre-baby shirt to slap on, and compare to one of the last times you wore it, that you realize you truly ARE big as a house.

Sigh.

BlogHer '10 in NYC. 135-ish pounds.	Now. NOT 135-ish pounds. Oy.

Photo taken by Stephanie Himel-Nelson	face palm

HELLO, BABY!

DUDE. WHOA. And it ain't even over yet.

Stop the presses! Actual maternity shirt on here. I finally broke down and got a couple.

Where's my Santa Suit? Ho! Ho! Hooooooly Belly!

Can I tell you sucktastic it is to be THIS pregnant and planning for the holidays? Trying to brave crowds and traffic is not fun, friends. I'd rather be water-boarded in China, or have one of the Kardashians move in next door. Effin' torturous, man!

I am particularly pleased with myself. I have found some awesome-tasticly inexpensive-yet-stylish things to wear for these last twelve weeks. (Preggo fashion show, anyone?) Unfortunately, being my last pregnancy, I'll be wearing these for twelve weeks, plus postpartum time, before they're goners. For good. That sucks.

I have to say, though, I'm really enjoying taking these (almost) weekly belly pics. I didn't really do that with the others (mainly because, it never occurred to me before). I would also like to get some maternity photography done (I've never really done that, either). Know of any non-awkward poses for a (very) pregnant woman? Did you ever have pregnancy photos taken before? I'd love to see them!

Baby bump progression thus far:

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

The Pregnancy What-Ifs and Nevers I Can't Shake

2011-12-15T11:17:00.007-06:00

I am having a tough time with this pregnancy. I am struggling in ways I never, ever imagined I would.

Every morning when Baby Dude wakes, I change his diaper, reaching into his dresser drawer for an outfit, one that's chock-filled with history from my previous two sons. His dresser is full of things his older brothers once wore. I watch my Baby Dude's chunkamunk thighs slipping into the waist, and through the head-hole of the shirt, and I can almost see his older brothers at this age, too. And I flash, instantly, back to that time, back to the room I was in, only for a split-second, and it makes my heart ache.

I am so torn over this pregnancy.

My sons have had the extreme pleasure of wearing each other's clothing. Their clothing is well-worn, but timeless. There's always some history involved with what they wear, what gets passed down, and the pride in their faces and onlooking eyes as they see their littler siblings traipsing around the house in something they wore when they were smaller is just too much for my momma heart to bear. It's a bond they share that I love seeing most of my children partake in, because not all of them get to.

My oldest son, of course, gets new items, but gets the satisfaction of passing down his items to his younger brothers. Same with my oldest daughter, who passes her clothing down (currently) to my middle daughter. My middle daughter (eventually) will pass down SOME of her clothing to my youngest daughter, but a lot from my oldest two daughters didn't "make" it. But for my toddler daughter? In all her pretty dresses and fluffy pink tops that flow and twirl, she doesn't get to, and hasn't shared this bond. With anyone. She's gotten new almost all her life, never really passed down much from anyone, and if this new baby isn't a girl, she won't have anyone to pass her things down to, either. She'll never feel that same proud feeling. Ever.

There were a lot of her clothes that were completely new. Things we couldn't keep from her older sisters, between the age gaps, the moves, light pink and purple stuff doesn't keep too well, not as well as dark blue stuff for boys. We salvaged as much as we could; toys here and there, baby blankets, etc. The sizes that have withstood the test of time start about age 6 or so, with a smidgeon of a smaller size here and there (my toddler is about to be five). But after learning our clothing-saving lesson, there are entire containers in my garage filled with newish baby things from my youngest daughter when she was small, things that I've kept wrapped tightly, sheltered away from the elements, saved from my toddler daughter for the "what if we have another girl" time. Clothes that might never pass on to a baby sister if this child isn't a girl.

Memories. History.

I'm not one of those people that overly hopes for one sex of a child over the next, ever. I'm always team green, team neutral, if you will. We have been blessed to have three boys and three girls, and always wait until birth to find out the sex of the baby, loving the true surprise of it all. All I've ever wanted a healthy baby, and, of course, I still do. But this time? Our last time, ever? With the vasectomy appointments planned and attended, and plans to "close up shop" after this one is born, it is about so much more that wanting this or that. It isn't about me, it's about the "nevers" for my youngest daughter that I just can't shake.

We weren't able to cloth diaper with Baby Dude due to our horrible water situation in Louisiana, but now? With this new baby? We can! And I still have my daughter's stash, brimming with pinks and purples and fuzzy loveable diaper fluff I can't wait to wash anew and apply to this baby's sweet tush - but it's all for a girl. And if this child isn't a girl, we'll have to sell it all and buy blue, replacing all her diapers she once wore. More items of hers she wouldn't get to share.

If this baby isn't a girl, I will never have an infant girl again. My toddler will never have a baby sister. She won't share those proud moments, seeing her baby sister wearing things she once wore. She will never have those bonding moments with her sister in which she tucks in her collar that once draped her neck, or straightens her skirt that once tickled her baby thighs. Some of her things would be preserved, of course, but otherwise, sold or donated, and she would never have that chance to share that with a sister. And this lump in my throat, imagining this play out, hurts me so deeply, I can't stand it.

And I really, really don't know what to do about it. I never considered how much the "last" pregnancy would weigh heavily upon my emotions and mind in trivial ways such as this.

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Why Toddlers Are Smarter Than Parents, Lesson 1

2011-12-14T08:00:00.001-06:00

Hiccup!

My sweet Baby Sis and her girly-ish voice are making these high-pitched hiccup sounds while standing next to my husband.

Hiccup!

He's packing his gym bag for tomorrow morning's PT, getting ready..

Hiccup!

"Baby? Why don't you go over there and hold your breath until your hiccups are gone?"

"Otay." Hiccup!

About ten minutes later, my oldest son comes in, looking for his missing wallet. "Have you seen it? Baby Dude says it's in here."

"What? Why would it be in our room?" I puzzledly ask.

"Because they always take my stuff and move it, and Baby Dude says it's in here."

I call out to Baby Sis, but don't see her as she enters the room to answer, "Baby Sis? Do you know where your brother's wallet is?"

"Nope!"

Snap! I hear skin-on-skin contact.

"Were you two playing with his wallet when you were playing with the fake money earlier?"

"Nope!"

Snap! I hear skin-on-skin contact again. I turn to face her, seeing her grasping her mouth with both her hands. Apparently, the 'snapping' I've been hearing is her removing her hands from her face long enough to answer, then immediately 'snapping' them back.

"Baby? What's the matter? What are you doing?"

"Daddy says I have to hold my breath because I have the hiccups."

And then I die with laughter, affirming toddlers are truly smarter (and more literal) than parents.

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

When Your (Broken) Tailbone is Being Douchey

2011-12-13T13:33:00.000-06:00

Seventh grade is always a tough time to be a kid. But when you fall on Halloween and break your tailbone, it can be even tougher. I remember wincing while biting my lip when the doctor suggested I sit on an inflatable "donut" to relieve the pressure of the hard desk chairs in school until I healed. Was he kidding? I'm supposed to walk around with a floatie pillow for my ass, and sit on it? And not expect to be ridiculed?

Like I said, it was a tough time. I endured enough ridicule for a day or two before I gave up on the floatie altogether and decided gritting my teeth and/or sitting on one leg would just have to do.

It wasn't until years later, when my son was born in '04, that I'd experience tailbone pain again. He was my VBAC, and he was my biggest baby, and he was stuck coming out with shoulder dystocia. Besides ripping me every way to Sunday, they re-broke my tailbone just to get him out of me. To say it was a traumatic birth experience would be understating it by A LOT.

Ever since that day, my tailbone has ached in a way it didn't before. I am not particularly sure why - it may not have healed correctly, or perhaps it was such a bad re-break that day. Nonetheless, sitting directly on my tailbone as others can do for me is impossible. Sometimes sitting on the floor for too long will make it ache. And, as you can imagine, each pregnancy since has been particularly trying in that area, nevermind the ridiculous fact that all doctors want you to do is sit.directly.on.your.tailbone while giving birth, so they can "see" the action. It's why I labor at home for as long as I can.

With Baby Sis, our OB was a God-send. We arrived at the hospital that night with the explicit request that we only get checked, and he obliged, checking me and sending me home, knowing I knew what I was doing. After laboring and resting all night, I arrived early the next morning at 8cm, practically ready to rock and roll, and she was born a short time later. He knew I didn't want to sit, because of my tailbone, and the entire staff was great in allowing me to 'do my thing' until it came time to push.

With Baby Dude, new hospital and area, I didn't even go in and get checked when labor came on. I knew I wasn't ready to go yet, and so I stayed home to wait for our in-laws, trying to find peace in the wee hours of the night. But Baby Dude's position in me was quite different. I couldn't rest at all. He was directly on my tailbone, applying pressure. These were different labor pains than what I was used to, and I was quite concerned about how this would play out for my poor tailbone.

I, again, arrived at the hospital at 8cm, but this time begging, pleading for pain relief for my tailbone. Each contraction forced him further down and made my tailbone feel like it was pulling apart, like I was being split in two like a wishbone. Despite my rockin' and rollin' labor-wise, the second the epidural hit and I sat on my tailbone, my dilation didn't progress. At all. It was almost like the position I was in stopped him up like a cork inside me, and I stayed at an 8cm until I could feel again, and move myself. But this time, the pain was worse, as I had now been on my tailbone for a couple hours. There was no time for any relief, anything, it was all worn off, I was even worse pain now, and, since I moved, it was time. I pushed through that pain, through the labor pain and tailbone pain and birthed my second largest child, a full pound heavier than my previous.

I am hoping against hope this child remains a teeny one. One that doesn't seemingly influence my poor tailbone in any way. Labor is tough enough on a woman's body, but couple that with excruciating tailbone splitting pain, and you've got a nightmare.

My tailbone has never officially 'healed,' and it always hurts. Just last night, at my son's Christmas performance, our family stood for twenty-five minutes waiting to enter the gymnasium. I didn't think simply standing would affect me, but it did. This morning I could barely walk properly. My adoring husband took our children to school while I popped a couple ibuprofen and applied my ol' trusty heating pad.

I've still got twelve weeks to go in this pregnancy, too. I hope all this achin' isn't a foreshadowing of things to come. And by 'things to come,' I mean, a God-awful labor.

Gulp.

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

How to Use an Envelope to Help Kids Budget, Save Money, and Christmas Shop by Themselves

2011-12-12T09:48:00.006-06:00

I will never forget the day that my then second-grade children ran in the door from school, ecstatic about a piece of paper they held in their hands. "LOOK, MOM! I CAN GO CHRISTMAS SHOPPING FOR YOU!"

Up until that point, our sibling Christmas Shopping for one another involved hand-held baskets being covered by their winter coats as we split up and descended upon some unsuspecting in a dollar store somewhere. It wasn't fool-proof, because the littler ones never remembered to keep their voices down, ("OOH! I'll get her a BARBIE!") and the older ones weren't as stealthy as they thought they were, not realizing most shopping baskets had holes, and their siblings had prying eyes. This also didn't help them purchase things for us if we were supervising their selections.

When my children barreled through the door that day, proud with stiffened back and smiles from ear-to-ear, I knew before I even read the paper that the school had somehow come up with something special.

Back then, though, their "school store" had consisted of mostly donated and second-hand items - the gifts you'd been given that were lying around you had no need for. They did receive new items from local dollar stores and online shopping merchants, to beef up what they offered in their fundraiser. It didn't matter what they were offering wasn't the best, what mattered was the children were allowed to shop for us, pick out something themselves, and be able to keep it a surprise from both myself and my husband, as they'd wrap their selections in class, too.

Not everything has lasted the test of time from that year, but I do still have my "Mom" pin from my daughter:

When my (now) second-grader came home with announcement paper, he, too, was ecstatic. "Mom! There's going to be a Christmas shop at school! And I get to buy stuff there!"

Unfortunately, he didn't quite grasp the whole, you're-supposed-to-buy-for-others-and-not-yourself thing. And when told, he wasn't particularly pleased. "Awww, man!"

But he came around to the idea, realizing he could secretly shop for us, without our knowing. And I have to admit, I was surprised, though, to witness the great lengths the school went to for this Holiday Store idea. We received so many materials to look over and plan with, and I think it's a wonderful idea.

This idea goes well beyond a fundraiser for the school and present-buying for my children - it gave my son independence and the ability to count money, budget and plan for himself, making lists and using addition. He was able to use the following list with which to circle and choose items, secretly.

He then wrote his choices on the envelope provided, with prices, adding them up so that he could ask me for the appropriate amount of money.

On the back of the envelope, the school store wrote in each price, verifying it matched the front, tallying up what was spent and what was owed.

And he did it all by himself!

It gave me the idea to do the same for my other children, too. They may not have gotten the chance to have an in-school store like my second grader did, but I made copies of the envelope (as seen above), so they could write (in pencil) their gift ideas for their siblings. We could then research, then write in the prices we'd find, allowing for them to do the same with saving, budgeting, adding, and hiding their choices from others by placing the slip in the envelope as we shopped.

I love this envelope budgeting idea for their holiday shopping, don't you? It fits pretty well with our envelope saving idea, pairing quite nicely with our Kidworth accounts, too.

Do you do something like this to help your children save/spend money?

I'm a Kidworth Ambassador and this post is sponsored by Kidworth

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Way to Suck, Alarm Clock!

2011-12-09T09:24:00.002-06:00

Dear School:

Please excuse XYZ child from almost being late this morning, our alarm clock didn't go off because it currently reads it's "IP:08" and I don't know what time that is.

Sincerely,
Lisa Douglas

(Seriously, what the hell does this say?)

(P.S. Thank Google for the alarm clock app on the Droid. Holla!)

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

My Steelers Kids

2011-12-08T10:40:00.005-06:00

As if I needed yet another reason to love this place, the kids get to wear their jerseys to school for the Thursday night game tonight, woohoo! My younger son had "pajama day" but didn't compromise, he wore his jersey as the 'shirt' of his pjs. SCORE!

We are ready for Browns, baby!

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

The Kmart Layaway Secret Santa

2011-12-08T10:27:00.004-06:00

I love these types of holiday stories this time of year, showcasing the kindness of strangers. This particular story involves a woman, donating a cart-full of toys at her local Kmart, and deciding to give even more. Except, she wasn't shopping for more toys to donate, she wanted to pay someone's layaway purchase, too. Three 'someones,' to be exact.

She asked the Kmart attendant, "Can I, you know, pay off some people's layaway?"

When asked if she was trying to pick up layaway without an ID, she responded, "Nope, I just want to help people."

Source: Secret Santa picks up 3 layaway bills

With 800 different layaway accounts available to pay off at that store, she randomly chose three that abided by her one and only rule - that the layaway purchase have toys on it. She paid about $500 in total.

"It was really crazy the way she did it. She was so excited and so happy to do it," said Goddard. "She had a great heart, and I told her that I felt like she had a great heart, and she said she doesn't want to take appreciation for it. She just felt that she was blessed and she wanted to bless others." - source

Choosing to remain anonymous, the secret santa Kmart shopper simply signed the paid receipt 'from a friend.'

I simply love this story. I love how you can turn something as simple as saving money during the holidays with layaway into an unsuspecting gift for someone else. How thoughtful and inventive is that? Who knew you could be a secret santa at a Kmart layaway counter? I certainly didn't, until now.

It actually has me thinking about the gesture, how I could be visiting my local Kmart to pay down my layaway and suddenly (and sneakily) choose to pay towards someone else's, too. Pay it forward (kind-of). I like it!

Have you ever done something like this? Whether paying someone's layaway, or take-out order, or toll?

Disclosure: I am a compensated Kmart Layaway Ambassador but my opinions, experiences and money-saving powers of awesome are all mine.

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Slathered

2011-12-07T10:52:00.003-06:00

With each pregnancy comes the lotion "rubbing" from my children on my belly. It's become a tradition - mom needs lotion on her belly, they get to massage me and rub the baby, and everyone wins.

Over the years, though, it's progressed from a baby belly kind-of thing to become an all-encompassing, all-over-the-body kind-of thing, to include my feet. I made the mistake of letting them use my no-longer-sold body butter from Body Shop this time....

What's left of my favorite lotion!

I, then, made yet another mistake of letting them do it two days in a row.

I am now slick, like oil. They slathered my feet so horribly thick, I have two sets of socks on, in hopes the warmth will eventually permeate my skin and it will seep in. Yesterday, my belly was so coated with lotion, even after my attempts to rub it in, it seeped through my t-shirt! Even I, myself, could not get it into my skin properly, no matter how hard or wide I massaged.

My super-shiny leg. Holy hell, I bet I am waterproof!

And yet, their little baby fingers weaving over my tired legs, belly, feet and back felt too scrumptious to pass up, they are my little baby-run spa getaway, making a tired mommy relaxed, even if I have more on my skin than I do in my container, now.

They love me, and want to do something nice for me. And love them so much for that. I could go thirty years without dry skin, because of them, and I wholeheartedly appreciate their love. And massage-y fingers.

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Our Holiday Day & Christmas Cards 2011

2011-12-06T10:17:00.004-06:00

Yesterday, I was determined to make Monday not suck. I baked cookies with my Baby Sis, prepared a yummy KFC-inspired Mashed Potato Bowl dinner for my family, all while baking even more (this time, Banana Cupcakes) and doing holiday crafts* with my toddlers.

It. Was. Heavenly.

This is probably one of my most favorite reasons to love this time of year: The Baking. The Crafts. The Decorating. The Food. The Surprises.

And then, a knock at the door, with a deliveryman handing me a box chock-filled with our Christmas cards. Here's the one we ended up choosing:

Front

BACK

Can't wait to pick up holiday stamps and get these babies sent out. Have you ordered your Christmas Cards yet? What are YOU doing to get into the holiday spirit?

*Want to do some crafts with your kids, too? Try our Gingerbread Man Coloring Page!

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Gingerbread Man Coloring Page

2011-12-06T10:14:00.003-06:00

We had fun creating crafts yesterday. We colored in our Gingerbread Man and then added googly eyes and foam piece buttons. Today my daughter wants to add glitter to him, too.

Want to create your own masterpiece with your kids or students?

Let me know if you choose to download and what you ultimately come up with! I'll follow up with our coloring page creations, too!

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Mom vs. The Kids - The Laundry Battle

2011-12-05T11:18:00.004-06:00

My newest post from my "Things That Make Mom Go Batshit" series.

The kids' I.O.D. illness has gotten substantially worse. I had to brace myself last night when fumbling through the last-minute laundry basket to sort clothing out.

(Side *mom's mental* note: Yes, I totally said "last-minute laundry basket." I mean, what the hell, kids? I do laundry every Sunday before the next week of school. Three loads were finishing up. As if I wasn't already going nutso from the sheer enormity of laundry you kids produce on a weekly basis, you sneak-attack me and bring down the oh-so-forgotten Green Hamper of Doom™ down to my laundry room on a Sunday night, on this poor, unsuspecting mom, just when I think all is well and done? Chock-filled with laundry from the past week they didn't bring down. To include almost every.single.solitary.pair.of.jeans my two sixth graders own. WHATHEHELLKIDS!?)

I peeled each item from the basket, one by one, only to discover my daughter's I.O.D. was out in full-freakin'-force. Underwear still in her jeans. Pants completely inside-out. Seams a-showin'. Completely reversed. After three sets of jeans like this from her, and two from my son, I lost it. I yelled, out loud, "ELEVEN YEAR OLDS SUCK AT TAKING OFF CLOTHES! JUST SAYIN'!"

My husband laughed at me. He then called down to the kids to come down to get a "talk" from me about it. They shuffled, slowly, dragging their feet into the kitchen, rounding the corner to face me. They were met with the Angry Mom Eyes™, resembling something probably like this:

Also known as Mom Goes Thermonuclear, Film at 11

"KIDS!? DO YOU KNOW HOW TO TAKE OFF YOUR PANTS?"

"Yes....." they mumbled from under their breath.

"NO! NO YOU DON'T! Because if you DID!? You would NOT have pants that look like THIS!"

And without looking, I pulled out the next pair of jeans, being completely inside-out, underwear stuck at the crotch, and smoke coming out of my ears.

"IT IS NOT THAT HARD TO TAKE OFF PANTS. HERE! LET ME SHOW YOU!"

And I moved the basket over, and began to instruct them. My daughter's hand immediately went up to her mouth in disbelief, that mom was about to pants herself in the freakin' laundry room. OH YES, KIDS! I AM! BELIEVE IT!

"YOU PULL YOUR PANTS DOWN, KNEE LEVEL, SEE?!"

They didn't nod. They stood there in shock. Mom's pants were down, like she's going to the bathroom. I could see they were visibly shaken. "THEN, YOU TAKE YOUR HAND, AND YOU BRACE YOURSELF, OR SIT DOWN, OKAY!?"

Again, crickets. Just stares.

"THEN, STARTING AT THE ANKLE..." dramatic pause here as I balanced on one foot, pausing, to show them what an ankle actually is, "YOU THEN PULL OFF YOUR PANTS FROM THERE, SEE? ONE AT A TIME! NOW, IS THAT HARD, KIDS?!?!"

I got very, very slow head-shakes from side-to-side. I wasn't havin' it. "WELL!!?! DO YOU UNDERSTAND?!?"

"Yes, mom." they responded in unison, voices cracking, fearing for their lives.

"Okay then. You may now return upstairs and continue doing whatever you were doing. But SO HELP ME GOD if I find pants this way again."

And then I shot them the "OR ELSE" face, like this:

And I believe I may have gotten through to them. We'll see, though.

Does I.O.D. run rampant in your house, too?

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

26 Weeks - The Crying, Hysterical Preggo Edition

2011-12-02T10:38:00.004-06:00

Folks, I've had a "bad" couple of days. Humongously, stupidly, no-good, very "bad" days. (I put "bad" in parenthesis because, honestly? I'm just being hormonally ridiculous). It's been a roller-coaster of nonsensical but sensical hysterics that would require a whole other post in which you all biff me on the back of the head, say I'm being silly, and then hug me for being so funnily dumb.

And pregnant. And emotional.

But this Mercury in retrograde thing has forced a few unexpected curveballs this preggo's way, ones I wasn't prepared to deal with, and my coping mechanisms are over-complicated by my over-emotional pregnant self.

Sigh.

And, being the kind-of stubborn person I am, the change is daunting, which means the collection of boogery tissues by my Macbook are mounting.

And speaking of mountain. Or do I mean mound?

I feel the waddle coming on. And getting out of bed has been a little rough, too. Which is funny, considering I'm only JUST about to enter the third trimester. My God!

But, I feel good, a little big but good. Hoping to not gain too much in the next trimester. (But who are we kidding, it's the friggin' holidays, yo! And I just enjoyed the last piece of pumpkin pie with egg nog for breakfast. THIS CANNOT END WELL!)

Now, who is going to stroke my hair like a child, tell me I'll be fine, and sweep away the boogie-filled tissues from my desk. Anyone?

Edited: Whoops! Forgot to post this:

Baby bump progression thus far:

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Paradise by the Christmas Tree Lights

2011-11-30T11:22:00.004-06:00

The end-of-day wiggles and giggles weren't out of their baby bodies yet. Even after shutting off all the lights, and sitting quietly with them, they figdeted, and tossed, and couldn't quite settled. The tree twinkled, illuminating the living room, and I suddenly got an idea. "C'mere, kids!"

They jumped up and scurried over to me, now kneeling beside the tree. "Come lay right here, and look up."

They flattened out on their backs against the carpet, and suddenly, they saw it. "Look at the ceiling," I told them.

"Ooooh!"

Their eyes lit up brighter than the tree itself.

There's nothing quite as magical as staring at the ceiling from under the tree, watching the lights dance mysterious shadows about the room, as if they're choreographing their illuminated rhythm all just for you.

No matter your age, it never gets old.

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Helping Kids Save Money - Mom is the "Banker"

2011-11-30T10:42:00.002-06:00

One of our many piggy banks
in the house

When kids are little, it's "easy," isn't it? Only dealing with coins and piggy banks and little ones fumbling for loose change in daddy's pockets, or shrieking with delight when a coin falls out of the dryer, or is found in a couch cushion. But for the older kids, though, with tooth fairy visits and birthday money and odd-jobs payments a-comin', their coins have turned to dollar bills, and their newfound riches are fastly becoming too intriguing to them to keep ceremoniously in a ceramic shape on their dresser.

Especially when their money began disappearing.

My older children began carrying it with them, ultimately losing it. They would bring it along "just in case" they were able to spend something while we were out, all without our knowing. Or, afraid others might find it, they'd hide it in random spots, and completely forget where they hid it, and it was seemingly lost forever.

That's about the time we began having the "talk" with them. And no, not the birds and the bees talk, the money talk. The one that begins with, "I know it's cool to have money, but..." and ends with lessons about saving and not spending it just because it's there.

It doesn't take very much to teach them, though, because they watch what we do constantly. That's what children do as they grow, they observe. And part of this money-saving lesson is ensuring they watch you do what you're teaching them, too. "Walking the walk," as it were.

-They see us choosing to create homemade meals instead of eat out.
-They see us shopping many grocery stores for the best deals, and charting our progress.
-They watch us comparison shop, clip coupons, and wait until things go "on sale."
-They watch us place spare change in our "Vacation Fund" jar so they witness that, no matter how little, all money matters.
-They watch me make things instead of buy, like homemade Christmas decorations.
-We enjoy doing crafts, playing outside, and renting movies instead of costly movie ticket prices.

To solve their "money being lost" issue, I instituted a new rule in the Douglas household - Mom is The Banker. Each child (except for the youngest two) received their own envelope with their name on it. Each child gave me all the (cash) money they could find to be placed into the envelope, and every time they earned more, received some from the Tooth Fairy, or received some for their birthday, or odd jobs, they gave it to me to "deposit" into their envelopes.

Their envelopes sit on a shelf above my office desk in my bedroom.

With each "deposit," I write the date and amount. With each "withdrawal" (when there is one), I write the date and amount as well. They are not *supposed* to touch their money, but there have been times when they have, where my hands are otherwise busy, they wanted to be sneaky (whatever). But mom being the banker has totally helped my kids and saving.

When they come to me wanting to "withdraw" from their envelope, they need to discuss with us the reasons for wanting the item they are desiring to purchase, and we talk about it rationally, calmly, and ultimately decide whether it's worth it or not. They also understand that mom controls their "finances" and, should they decide to be careless and not take care of something, they will have to owe to replace the item (like a scratched DVD or video game they left out carelessly).

Despite all this savings "talk" and such, while this method seems to be working well for us, we haven't been very goal-minded as far as their money goes. They are saving their monies respectively, but there is no end-goal in mind, really, no intelligent rationalization when it comes to the "I want that toy!" talk with a parental response that could be, "But you can't, you're saving for xyz, remember?" Up until now, our responses/discussions have been, "Do you really need it? Why do you want to spend your hard-earned and saved money on that?" But I was introduced to the website Kidworth, and now I feel a lot more confident in the savings direction we're going in.

Kidworth is a website devoted to helping children use their "income" productively by goal-setting and sharing. Whether that involves saving up for a "big" item (like a bike or, for teenagers, a car), investing or even charitable giving, Kidworth's parent council has prebuilt goals to help steer children towards their money savings goals, all done with parental controls and piece of mind.

I'm particularly excited about using Kidworth for my newly sixteen-year-old in helping her save for a car. She's actively looking for a job right now, and Kidworth is going to help her get to her goal much more efficiently than I could alone. My oldest son also wants to save up to enter Elite soccer, which is quite expensive at $1500. We're using Kidworth to help him save up for that, too. Plus, we're able to share with family and friends where we're at, so they can help and donate to their savings, too!

Interesting, isn't it? Take look at Kidworth's "How it Works" page for excellent info on how it will help both you and your children

Look for upcoming posts about how we're doing and what we're accomplishing, as I am a Kidworth Ambassador and am happy to share about our money-saving adventures with you.

What do you do currently to help your children save money? Do you have goals in place for them?

Post sponsored by Kidworth

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Cheap Homemade Christmas Decorating Ideas

2011-11-29T11:19:00.007-06:00

Are you looking for inexpensive Christmas decorating ideas? I love finding new and inventive ways to decorate for the holidays while pinching pennies. The decorating ideas I showcase here are also excellent crafts to do with children.

Between you and me, I love shopping end-of-the-season deals for the "bigger" stuff, when things are marked drastically down, but shopping for new at the end of the season doesn't help when you realize you need decor at the beginning of the season. And if you're military or a frequent mover, like me, sometimes you'll find, when unpacking your beloved holiday items, they didn't survive the move, and purchasing a replacement needs to happen immediately.

I'm also a craft-loving person, and I love the homemade look. Here are my easy tips to decorate for Christmas on the cheap.

Cheap and Easy Homemade Christmas Decorating Craft Ideas

1. Gift Tags and Ribbon for Hanging Garland

Yes, believe it or not, this is a set of four gift tags, ten tags were only a $1 at Walgreens, and I purchased a snowman, a Santa hat, a Christmas tree and gold reindeer. I tied each of these tags to a simple glittery red ribbon, and hung with thumbtacks from the edge of the ceiling. To keep it even and prevent too much sagging, I kept dividing them in half, separating as I hung them up. Pretty, no?

2. Coiled Decorative Ribbon for Doorways

I purchased some beautiful velvet ribbon, and paired it with gold, to coil and hang over my doorways, hanging them with clear thumbtacks.

3. Use Inexpensive Ribbon as Bow Embellishments

Here's another example of using ribbon over a grouping, like I do in the hallways, but do you see the candlestick on the shelf? I purchased yet another type of wide fabric ribbon and fashioned bows to attach to my regular, everyday decor, to spruce them up for the holidays at little-to-no cost. I used this same ribbon for my homemade Christmas tree, too.

4. Decorate with Cheap Ornaments

Each of these adorable ornaments were only a dollar a piece. I hung them from the hooks on this shelf to add more holiday spirit here by the front door.

I used cheap ornaments here, too, to decorate a "tree" piece of decor whose glass pieces were broken in the move. Now, this "tree" serves as an ornament display on my shelf.

5. Pair Cheap Garland with Lights

The fake pine garland above is pretty bare on it's own, and almost on it's last legs. However, when paired with inexpensive chunky LED lights (LED to help save you money on electric), it really gives off the holiday ambiance well, and you barely begin to notice the garland's age anymore.

Also on the shelf you'll find bargain holiday tchotchkes each a dollar or two a piece. When paired together with my regular decor and new ornament "tree" like this, they look more expensive, don't you think?

6. Add Inexpensive Scented Pine Cones to a Vase

These pine cones smell SO GOOD, and are decorated with glitter and color. Place them into a plain glass vase, and you can dress them up with a decorative bow (something I have planned). Note I added a decorative bow to the "tree" here (the one that isn't broken, that is).

I placed another bag of these pine cones in my trifle bowl in the kitchen, too. Really cute and inexpensive way to decorate and give off that delicious cinnamon scent for the holiday, too.

7. Hang Ornaments Staggered from the Ceiling

This beautiful set of twelve ornaments are adding flair to the opening between my kitchen and living room. Now, I have decor completely framing that opening, both on the shelf and from the ceiling.

8. Use Leftover Wrapping Paper to Decorate Empty Boxes like Gifts

If you're anything like me, you probably have leftover wrapping paper kicking around from last year. Put it to good use, and upcycle an empty box by wrapping it in that leftover paper, placing it sporadically around the house, or group together with other "gifts" to create that holiday feel.

9. Bulbs and Inexpensive Vases for Cheap DIY Christmas Centerpieces

As I explain in my budget-friendly DIY Christmas Centerpieces post, these sparkly ornaments came four to a tube and only cost a dollar per tube. I used approximately five tubes to fill this tall vase.

What ways do you inexpensively decorate your home for the holidays?

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Post Turkey Day Coma & Cyber Monday Shopping - Yeah, Baby!

2011-11-28T12:14:00.003-06:00

Death by beautiful turkey

After taking the holiday weekend off, I am exhausted! And you would THINK I'd be well-rested after "time off," right?

WRONG.

Between all the standing while cooking on Thanksgiving, shopping on Black Friday, and decorating the house all weekend, this preggo feels like she ran a marathon!

But despite the crowds this weekend for Black Friday, we scored some wonderful deals! But all the tryptophan from eating turkey leftovers while we decorated our house and put up our tree all weekend is leaving me with a whopping Thanksgiving hangover, man.

Regardless of my overwhelming turkey coma, today is Cyber Monday, and I plan to partake on the awesome sales and doing even more shopping today. (Yes, I am nuts. Send help.) I would share what's on my "must buy" list, but then my kids and husband might read and see, and I don't want to ruin their surprise!

I mentioned last week that layaway was available for Black Friday at Kmart, but today Kmart is offering layaway for Cyber Monday, too!

The Shop Your Way Rewards offer is still happening until Wednesday, too!

You get the added bonus of locking in the fabulous Cyber Monday internet savings and paying down the balance into easy installments without credit. Sweet!

When you have a lot of kids like me, Christmas shopping can be kind-of tough to swing. I tend to shop during the day while the older kids are at school, but it's tough to hide the items from the two toddlers, who are still with me. I am extremely excited to be able to shop online with Kmart, make payments to my layaway online, too, and THEN choose to pick up my items at any store I want to. No hiding toys from toddlers. Plus, with layaway, I can choose to pick it up closer to Christmas, so I don't have to worry about space to hide at home, either.

My layaway experience with Kmart has been nothing short of a breeze. Once an item is found that I like, I add it to my cart, and from within my cart, I see this:

It immediately gives you the option to put your item/s on layaway, and pick-and-choose which to put on layaway for later or pay for now. Isn't that wonderful and convenient?

Whenever you want to log back in to manage your layaway, make a payment, or schedule a pickup, you'll always see this screen on kmart.com/layaway

I can't begin to tell how you how convenient having Kmart layaway is for me, especially now that I'm in that "my belly is in the way of everything" phase. This will make Christmas shopping that much easier for me this year.

Want to see all Kmart is offering? Visit kmart.com/gifts to find some inspiration and see what they're offering for Cyber Monday. To find out more about Kmart layaway this season, visit kmart.com/layaway or call your local store for details.

Did you score anything extraordinarily excellent this weekend, I hope? What more is on your list?

Disclosure: I am a compensated Kmart Layaway Ambassador but my opinions, experiences and money-saving powers of awesome are all mine.

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Holiday Cards Input - Can You Help Me Pick?

2011-11-23T12:20:00.002-06:00

I am going to NOT suck and wait until the last minute this year to send cards or plan to send cards. I don't mean to procrastinate. I promisepromisepromise to have all my addresses printed (with a working printer again, yay!) and actual holiday stamps and niceties 'n stuff. I have to be sure I'm on my holiday game this year, with our address change and all.

Besides, being the craft-lover that I am, I love taking holiday cards sent to me over the years and creating wonderful crafts out of them with the kids, to recycle and make pretty decorations (tutorials coming). Doesn't that sound like so much fun?

This year, with all our travel adventures we've taken, and many photos I've taken, I want our cards to really razzle-dazzle. But I'm really torn on what to pick.

What do you the following do you think I should get? I've narrowed down my choices to these ~~three~~ four that I found at Tiny Prints.

Or this one?

Or THIS one!?

Or.... THIS one?

Ahh, do you see my dilemma? Which would you pick for my big family?

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Thanksgiving Coloring Sheets and Printables

2011-11-23T12:00:00.002-06:00

If you're like me, with kids home all week, you're looking for coloring sheets and activities for your kids to do for Thanksgiving. My kids are busy at work with what I've found - want to try these for yourself? Check 'em out!

Break out the crayons and color a festive fall scene with Disney Family Fun's Leaf-Diving Fun printable!

Want a new twist on an old Thanksgiving craft tradition? Try this background for your Thanksgiving Handprint Turkey Craft!

If the kids get a little antsy waiting for the turkey to be served, have them color their own Thanksgiving Placemat Coloring Page!

Blissfully Domestic has two really great activity books you can download and print! Check these out: Children's Fall Activities Printables and Thanksgiving Party Printables.

Have you found some great crafts or coloring pages for Thanksgiving? Share them with me in the comments below!

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Why Layaway Rocks My Socks

2011-11-22T11:03:00.005-06:00

Photo Credit: jimw on Flickr

I don't know about you, but I'm a planner. When it comes to purchasing and giving gifts for the holiday season, I've already been shopping for Christmas since almost last Christmas. (I know, it's a sickness.) I shop end-of-season sales all year round, always having my eye out for the best deals, already having in my mind "a list" to refer to on what to get for whom. But I have to be honest, despite my best money-saving techniques all-year-round, there are some sales closer to Christmas that I love that you can't beat (like Black Friday sales), and sometimes, no matter how good the sale, I can't swing an entire desired purchase all at once, right there and then. And in times like this, that's when layaway comes into the picture and befriends me in all its money-saving glory.

With layaway, I have the ability to take advantage of great sales and not have to pay for it all at once, by making installments towards my purchases over a period of time. I don't like using credit cards, and thankfully layaway allows me the freedom to shop and choose bigger ticket items and/or large purchases that I can put away and make payments on without credit. Score! Some popular stores that offer layaway, however, seemingly have way too many restrictions on what you can and can't do, what items are offered, and when I'm shopping, I'm referring to my list, I'm shopping the sales, and I don't want limitations or restrictions to remember, you know?

Of all the stores out there that offer layaway, in my opinion, Kmart and Sears have one if the best and easiest to use, and not just during the holidays, either! Want to shop earlier in the year like me? With Kmart and Sears, you can shop all-year-round, and get that great Christmas present whenever that big sale hits (say, March), then pay it down using layaway. You can even shop in-store and then turn around and make payments online for it, and vice versa! That flexibility option is HUGE and one of the reasons I'm such a huge Kmart/Sears fan.

I'm pleased to share with you that Kmart recognizes my love for the "Blue Light" and has brought me on this holiday season as a Kmart Layaway Ambassador for 2011! I, along with a few other bloggers, get to share with you just how easy it is to utilize Kmart's layaway program, both in-store and online. (Yes! I'll say it again! ONLINE! Woohoo!)

Kmart's layaway is super simple:

KMART OFFERS BLACK FRIDAY LAYAWAY! OMG!
You pay a $5 service fee for a new contract, with $15 or 10% down.
4 - 6 easy payments, every other week, depending upon using an 8 or 12 week contract. You can even pay down your purchase even faster than every other week if you want.
Cart minimum is $15 for 8-week layaway, but $300 for 12-weeks.

Right now, they're offering a layaway special: if you're a Shop Your Way Rewards member (sign-up is free!), and you sign up with a new layaway contract (between 11/16 - 11/27), you can get a $5 gift card FREE for an 8-week program, or $10 gift card FREE for a 12-week program! Be sure to use the code LAYAWAY at check out on kmart.com, or visit kmart.com/layaway to download the special barcode to use in store.

Also, from now until November 30th, earn 2X the points on all qualifying purchases at Kmart and kmart.com. Not a SYWR member yet? Visit Shop Your Way Rewards for more details and to sign up. Membership is free, and you earn on every purchase!

Want to see all Kmart is offering? Visit kmart.com/gifts to find some inspiration, or to find out more about Kmart layaway this season? Visit kmart.com/layaway, or call your local store for all the details.

What about you? Do you use layaway for holidays? Have you ever used layaway for other occasions (anniversary, birthday)? What are some things you'd love to put on layaway to make payments on?

Disclosure: I am a compensated Kmart Layaway Ambassador but my opinions, experiences and money-saving powers of awesome are all mine.

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

A Happy Birthday Lesson (To Me)

2011-11-20T11:07:00.003-06:00

Today, as I celebrate being thirty-five years young, and (not) celebrating having to check off the 35-44 category on questionnaires now (instead of the 25-34 category), I am proof that you're never too old or too young to keep learning new, valuable lessons. Even on your birthday.

----

Yesterday, when my husband took (most of) the kids out of the house (I imagined, in search of a gift for me for my birthday), I had a house filled with nothings and silence that I had no idea what to do with myself. I strapped on my (too tight) compression pants and a pregnant belly-exposing tank-top, and began cranking in some miles on the elliptical, having been way too long since the last time I'd set foot on it.

I wasn't even on it for a .1 mile before one of my sons came in with an argument. I stop.
After his issue was fixed, and I restart the elliptical and DVR, another son comes in with HIS problem. I stop. Again.
And then his problem gets fixed, and I restart the elliptical and DVR, huffing and puffing in aggravation and now, instead of a relaxing, "Time for me" workout, it's about releasing aggressions and painful reminders to myself why I haven't seen the dang thing in a few weeks.

The doorbell rings. Surely, it had to be one of the neighbor kids, I thought to myself. "DAMN IT! NOW WHAT!?" I let out in a loud yell, infuriated and aggravated.

I huff and puff my way to the door, sweat forming, towel around my neck, practically marching when I approach my glass door and see it's a blonde woman with a button down blouse I don't recognize. I open the door.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!" She says to me, smiling.

My look of WTF turned into a look of shock.

She had, in her hands, a beautiful bouquet of flowers with a bright orange card. I was suddenly heavily embarrassed by my anger and frustration. "Thank you," I stammered, peeking behind her to see a familiar mom-type minivan with a small person peeking out the window, waving, helping her mother with deliveries.

Tears welled up behind my eyes, as I hid them from her while looking down at the bouquet in the beautiful heavy purple vase (my favorite color). I thanked her again and closed the door to let the tears fall. I hadn't even opened the card yet.

These lovely flowers are from the kind folks at Nintendo. Thank you for always being so wonderful to me!

----

This morning, my toddler tried waking me to tell me she was hungry. I couldn't tell if she was talking in her sleep or actually wanting to eat. It didn't matter, though, I had no idea of the time, and since I'm a light sleeper, she had awakened me. I laid there, cuddling her for a while, after finally realizing she was dreaming, wondering if I should just get up or relax a bit longer.

Footsteps came barreling down the stairs. Whispered discussions and opening/closing of the fridge, with an all-too familiar sound of the egg carton opening, and the over-spraying of the pan. Someone boop-beep-booped the house alarm off and went outside, plates shifting, forks whipping up eggs in a bowl, clammering around in the kitchen, despite their whispers and attempts to be quiet, I was now fully on RED ALERT in that my two eleven-year-olds were fixing eggs, and my oldest was the one outside to feed our neighbors dogs while they were away.

I stretched my leg over to a sleeping hubby, jabbing him in the leg with my toe, whispering softly but firmly, trying my best not to wake Baby Sis on my left arm, and Baby Dude on my right, both leaning on me. Finally, he stirred. "Babe, can you check on the kids? I'm pretty sure they're cooking eggs without supervision."

His eyes weren't even open, but he sat up, releasing a tired sigh, slumped over as he stammered, blurry-eyed into the kitchen. I heard his supervisory tone, and more dishes and forks and things happening. Minutes later, he appeared and laid back down. I tried whispering back and forth with him about what was happening, when Baby Dude woke up.

The conversation didn't last long, my husband tried his hardest to fall back asleep, but the overpowering smell of pancakes suddenly had me concerned again. "Babe? Are they making pancakes, too!?"

He bolted upright and into the kitchen as fast as he could. It was undeniable, the familiar smell of pancake batter, and neither child had any clue what they were doing. The dish-clanging was much louder, now, as were the whispers and sink running and "OH, WHOOPS" type responses I heard.

Moments later, standing before me, were two bright-eyed, wide-smiled eleven-year olds with a green kiddie plate filled with scrambled eggs and cinnamon toast they made for me. "Happy birthday, mom! We made you breakfast in bed!"

"Oh my..... thank you!"

Here, all this time, I thought they were trying to make themselves breakfast, and it was actually all for me. "Dad is making the waffle we were trying to make you. We were doing it wrong."

Baby Dude began eyeing my eggs, and Baby Sis, now awake, snagged a piece of raisin bread toast. (The kids had made me three slices.)

I never got to enjoy what they made, as it was picked off by my hungry toddlers, and I never got a waffle, because my son was trying to create his own recipe to make just.one.waffle. and added about twice as much milk as he should have (my husband told me he was stirring a bowl of lumpy milk trying to make it happen), but I truly appreciated their effort in wanting to make me breakfast for my birthday. They later confessed they'd actually wanted to stay up all night to do it. (Holy scary thought, Batman!)

What I found when I tried to make coffee - the mess they'd left behind creating my birthday breakfast. LOL

----

Mom's never-too-old birthday lesson learned - things are not always what they seem, and definitely not always the worst thing you've imagined. (But mom's instincts are dead on - yes, your kids were trying to burn the house down. They ran the toaster oven with plastic and paper still sitting on top.)

It might not be the most perfectly executed birthday ever, but it's always perfect when my family is celebrating it with me.

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Baby Justin Bieber

2011-11-18T15:56:00.002-06:00

I'm sitting by the back door, playing with my toddlers, sun on us, wind blowing slightly, and I look up and WHAM it hits me..

Does he, or does he not, look just like a baby version of Justin Bieber?

Am I right??

Photo Credit: Celebuzz.com

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

24 Weeks Baby Belly - The HOLY CRAP, IT GREW Edition

2011-11-18T10:05:00.003-06:00

I noticed this week my substantial need for maternity clothes all of a sudden. Up until now, I'd been wearing my regular clothes, but this week I was having a tough time finding things that fit properly. After taking this weekly "belly bump" picture, I now understand why. Holy crap!

First words that come to mind - THAR SHE BLOWS!!! o_O

...

Seriously, look at the difference between last week and this week!

And my belly button won't stay in at all, now. It's constantly out, pointing away, (pointier than two weeks ago), and driving me nuts. My kids keeping poking at it like it's their happy button, except, it's NOT MY HAPPY BUTTON, kids!

I don't know what's going on in there, but damn!

Baby bump progression thus far:

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

When Mom Takes A Day Off, She Gets Shinguards. (Huh!?)

2011-11-17T18:17:00.001-06:00

When other moms take the day off, they go shopping for themselves, treat themselves to a spa day, relax, eat out. Y'know, stuff like that.

Me?

I got myself and the kids dressed, and took my toddlers shinguard shopping. Because it's sexy and I'm a huge soccer dork who really wanted to get her daughter pink ones, m'kay?

(Just smile and wave, it's okay, I'm only a little weird.)

My daughter needed some new cold-weather shoes, anyway, since her sneakers from last season are literally two sizes too small. But the pink shinguards? I couldn't back down on. She really, REALLY wanted 'em. It doesn't even matter to her that soccer is over, now, what matters is that she saw a little girl playing soccer with a pink pair a few weeks back, and she wanted a pair, too.

Now I'm not a mother who generally does something like that, purchases something because my child wants something some other kid has. I'm very much a person who wants her children to not be those "Keeping Up with the Joneses" types. But honestly, I didn't even know they MADE pink shinguards, and so, this girly-lovin' mother geeked out all over 'em, too. I couldn't NOT oblige her.

Not to mention, she's had hand-me-down everything as far as soccer goes, thus far, so I don't mind spending ten bucks on something little and new and silly like this, and making it really special.

Unfortunately, her pink desires barely stopped there. Once we got there, she really wanted pink E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G. Pink socks. Pink cleats. Pink soccer ball. "But baby, you don't know what color you're going to be next season, pink socks and cleats might not match!"

"Yes they will! Pink matches everything!"

{Toddler logic FTW!}

But I was able to thwart her pink-will successfully. And now that she's got these beautiful pink shinguards, I don't think we're going to have any trouble. She lovesthemomgsomuch and I have to admit, I love that she loves them, because I love them, too.

You know, as a parent, there are so many "no's" you will dish out to your kids in their lifetimes. Choosing your battles wisely is key. And while an all-pink makeover wasn't necessary or needed, a ten dollar minuscule splurge? That I can handle. And I'm thrilled that I did.

My three crazy ones getting in on the picture action, too

We might be a crazy bunch, but they are always number one to me, pink shinguards or no.

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

That's It! Mom's on Time Out

2011-11-17T09:59:00.003-06:00

It's been a rough couple of days, but it won't be today, damn it. Today, I'm going to MAKE it a great day. I'm going out. As in, outside. With my kids. To breathe fresh air and do normal, mom-like things and not writer-mom type things, and maybe do some shopping-things, and living-things. And something I haven't done in a couple days; enjoying-things.

And maybe make myself a cup or two of this when I come home.

And a whole lot of snacking on this:

And hanging out doing this:

With none of feeling like this:

Or this:

(Except, there may be some partaking in cupcakes. Ahem.)

What do you do on YOUR day off?

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

When The Toddler Mascot Gets A Medal, Too

2011-11-16T09:54:00.001-06:00

He's the only one that didn't play on a team this soccer season, being too young. He dressed up every game and played in spirit, though. "Where's my sotter twoze (soccer clothes)?" he'd say, as he watched his older siblings dress Saturday mornings.

When the season ended, all our children had parties with snacks and playing and... trophies with medals. He didn't play, so he doesn't get anything.

However, as luck would have it, there was a child who paid to play on my husband's team but never showed. As hubs dipped into his baggie of medals, to hang each around his players' necks, he discovered the extra one at the bottom, the one they secured for the player that never showed, a medal that had no owner.

And my husband got an idea. A big idea for a not-so-big person.

At the end of their team's trophy/medal ceremony, he wanted to hand out "one more" award to someone. Their special sidekick, who always applauds his hardest for their team. Their mascot and pint-sized cheerleader, as it were.

Baby Dude's name was called. "C'mere!" my husband called to him.

He ran up, excitedly, to see what his daddy had for him. My husband scooped him up, and gently placed the medal around his little baby neck, while his smile beamed so brightly, so proudly. And this mom may not have gotten a good picture because she was too wobbly with emotion.

Until he posed, with pride, with his brother and sister, later.

Three proud children. One dorky child.

And he clutched that medal in his hands, inspecting it. And this mom knew, just as daddy knew, that this meant the world to him. (And to us.)

This won't be the last one he'll ever receive, given his penchant for kicking the ball already and getting out there with his siblings - he's got a long life ahead of him of playing soccer. But this first medal? It just might very well be the sweetest.

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

DIY KFC Mashed Potato Bowl with Chicken Nuggets and Homemade Mashed Potatoes Recipe

2011-11-15T12:35:00.005-06:00

Hello, lover. How I love you and all your chicken-y cheese potatoey goodness!

Part of being a mother is realizing that chicken nuggets will always be on the menu. And why not? They're a lot of fun (and tasty, too)! However, I like to jazz things up sometimes. Chicken nuggets are definitely fun, but sometimes, uninspired.

You already know I like making a chicken nugget macaroni and cheese casserole, so it should come as no surprise to find I created my own, healthified recipe for KFC Mashed Potato Bowl using all-natural chicken nuggets and homemade mashed potatoes. And it was all easy to do, too!

DIY KFC Mashed Potato Bowl with Chicken Nuggets
Serves 8

Package of Chicken Nuggets (we use Tyson 100% All-Natural)
Mashed potatoes (you can use instant, or make your own. Recipe below.)
1 8oz package Shredded cheddar cheese
1 small bag of frozen kernel corn
seasoning (to taste)

Bake your chicken nuggets according to the package's directions. Depending upon what mashed potatoes type you use, make them according to package (or recipe below). Heat corn in the microwave or pan. Once potatoes are prepared and chicken is finished, you can choose to keep the chicken whole (see picture below) or cut into quarters. Layer potatoes with cheese, corn and chicken in a bowl. Season, if desired. TA-DA! Done!

Homemade Mashed Potatoes
Serves 8

8 medium-sized idaho potatoes, washed, cubed, skin left on.
milk
butter (we use Smart Balance Organic spread)
low-fat sour cream
seasoning (we use Mrs. Dash table blend, Onion and Garlic powder)

Boil water in a large saucepan 2/3 full with water. After water boils, add cubed potatoes, cut to 1-inch or less thick/width. Once boiling, reduce heat to medium, let continue to simmer/cook until potatoes are fork-tender. Drain. Add potatoes back to sauce pan, and add a few pats of butter, beating with a mixer. Add about 1/4 cup sour cream and beat with a mixer. Add a tablespoon of milk at a time, until you get a thick, rich, creamy consistency with your mixer. Season to taste, and add more butter or sour cream to taste, as needed.

You can choose to prepare or buy some chicken gravy to go over top your KFC Mashed Potato Bowl, to make it even more jazzed up. I decided, instead, to use BBQ sauce drizzled on top! Barbecue and cheddar on chicken? Yum!

Come to momma!

The possibilities are endless with what you can do with this recipe!

My children raved and raved about how awesome this was, and they ate every last bite. Score one for mom!

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Things That Make Mom Go Batshit (New Series) - The Shoe Bandit

2011-11-14T13:56:00.006-06:00

Welcome to a new series on Crazy Adventures in Parenting entitled "Things That Make Mom Go Batshit" - a look into the little, insane annoyances that can make a perfectly sane mother (ahem) lose her marbles in 2.3 seconds flat. Come, commiserate with me! Pull up a coffee cup and share with me your woes, friends!

--

I'm one of those people that puts things away in the same spot everyday. My flip-flops get slid off my feet right at the door, for easy on-and-off maneuvers with full hands. Plus, leaving them by the door all the time, I know where they are when I need them. All shoes usually get removed at the front door, and hopefully placed in the coat closet, so that my children can have that same confidence in knowing where their shoes are, too. (You see where this is going, don't you?)

My favorite sneakers (next to my running shoes, that is) remained on my feet inside the house one day, with a fast and furious dinner being prepared while I divided my focus between kids outside with my needing to cook inside. I did my normal split parental, mom-needs-more-than-two-hands-and-one-body thing. And I recall accidentally spilling boiling water on my foot, and screeching to my oldest son, "GET IT OFF! GET IT OFF! GET IT OOOOOOFF!" because it had seeped through the mesh on my sneakers and onto my toes. OWIE! He came to my rescue, flinging my shoe off somewhere, and that's the last we've ever seen of it. Ever. From that day forward, I've had one shoe. That's it. The shoe gremlins crept up and got it while I was wounded.

And because my love of that pretty pink New Balance shoe is so strong, and I'm such a money-saving die-hard pain in the ass, I refuse to get a new pair, because Murphy's Law 'n all, that sucker will pop up the second I rip the tags off the new shoe (you know what I'm talkin' about).

MISSING: One comfy, pretty pink-and-white shoe.

But my shoe isn't the only one being held hostage in this house somewhere by ghosts, one of my son's new Converse he wanted for school is now missing, too. His sister was cleaning off the stairs, and says she put it in front of his closet. He looked for it. She looked for it.

"Are you sure you put BOTH upstairs?"

"Yup."

And then they, collectively, looked for it together. Even I, in my all-seeing, magical mom powers went up and tore through his room with my keen set of parental eyes, but no dice, he has only one shoe that we can find.

What gives? What is so enticing about my boiling water pink shoe? And my SON'S!? Do you LIKE preteen foot sweat, Shoe Bandit?

So yeah. Apparently, our shoes are hiding out 'n having a shoe party with the ol' Shoe Bandit. Hopefully they don't overindulge, get wickedly dirty, and reappear sometime again soon. I miss my sneaks, yo!

--

Now, tell me.. what made you go batshit this week?

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Whirlpool Duet Washer Dryer Review and The Adventures of Mount Washmore

2011-11-13T16:33:00.009-06:00

I've written many (many) times here about my adventures in Mount Washmore, and my kindergarten ways to tackle it. Moving here to San Antonio was simply a God-send in so many ways. And one of those ways was deciding to sell our old washer and dryer and taking the plunge in purchasing a shiny new set.

We sold our old washer and dryer, just before moving, to a single soldier. It would do him a ton of good, being he's the only one he washes for, since those old pieces still had a ton of life left in 'em. But for our growing family? They weren't doing the job well enough. Laundry used to be a task I'd have to tackle everyday, and wash and rewash just to get it done to get the kids' stains and dirt out. Let's not forget to mention drying and redrying. It was a friggin' MESS, it was so tough!

I fell mildly in love with the Duet® set after hearing Katja talk about her "loving doing laundry." I heard a record scratch while I heard her say that - say WHAT? She LOVES doing laundry!?! Surely she can't be serious, can she? I hated doing laundry with the fire of a thousand suns!

And then I met the Whirlpool folks at the Mom 2.0 conference, and witnessed the Duet® series myself. We talked at length about it's features, and I was sold. Within a day or two of moving here to San Antonio, we bought the Duet® from Sears.

What we bought: Whirlpool Duet® Premium 4.3 cu. ft. Capacity Front Load with Fan Fresh and Whirlpool Duet® 7.4 cu. ft. Capacity Electric Dryer

I wanted to cry as the Sears install guys hooked it up for us. We had a week's worth of laundry in bags in the back of our van (while we unpacked the rest of our house) and countless other things that needed washing from the move, too. I could not wait to put these babies to the test.

And since June, we sure have put them through the ringer (laundry pun intended). I wanted to be sure I used 'em for just about everything before writing about this set. Our huge king-sized comforter? No big deal. Our kids' clothes? No big deal. Towels? Jeans? Dirt? Stains? Stomach flu? (Eww.) These babies manhandled it all.

So many wonderful options to set your washer, including "Fan Fresh" which keeps air flowing until you retrieve your wet clothes, preventing them from smelling.

I have to agree with Katja, now. I love doing laundry (and no, I'm not on drugs). Yes, I know I have six kids' laundry to do, with two outfit changes a day now that they're in school. But it's no longer time consuming for me to do! You have to understand, this washer and dryer saves me time, money, and sanity. Using these machines, I'm only doing laundry 2-3 times A WEEK. THAT'S IT!

These units hold so much more in clothing that I'm able to bang out my laundry demands a couple times a week. And (!!) I wash them once, and they're done. Clean. Finito. No two or three times washing AND drying to get 'em done, over and over. Both these units are amazingly efficient and fast.

I love the dispenser for the HE liquid on the washer - not only does it help make sure the clothes are cleaned properly (by NOT putting detergent directly onto the clothes before washing), it helps me save money, too, not only in using less water, but less detergent as well. I bought the big refill pouch of HE detergent, to use less waste.

The dryer gets everything done in a flash, too, with many cycles to help me get my laundry done in no time. My "normal" drying cycle is 43 minutes, and it's good enough for my jeans and towels.

It tumbles everything perfectly, and to ensure it doesn't sit too long and wrinkle, I have it even set to something called "Wrinkle Shield" which tumbles it every now and again until I have time to unload it.

This dryer single-handedly give me the wonderful, endless gift of helping me to avoid using my iron. It's called "Quick Refresh" and it uses steam and heat to get out the wrinkles in clothing. If your kids are anything like mine, they shove their perfectly folded clothing into their drawers, and then look like ragamuffins when it comes time to dress for school. Hello, Quick Refresh to the rescue!

On top of this unit being energy-saving, I also use reusable dryer sheets to save money that way, too.

And once I'm through using them in the dryer, I give them to my kids to put in their drawers.

Each unit emits a sing-songy jingle to tell me that they're done, and to remind me to retrieve them if I don't get them right away. You can turn that setting on and off, but I won't, it helps me!

Because we don't have a ton of detergents or anything to use, and because my laundry room is just off the kitchen, in our pantry, I use the laundry pedestals for much-needed pantry storage, mostly for pans and baking items.

Another thing I absolutely love about this washer, it tells me when it needs to be cleaned. (If only ALL appliances had this feature!) The light blinks to tell me when I need to clean it using Affresh, and cleaning it is a breeze, since it has it's own Affresh cycle you set it to. Just set the tablet in and go, it does all the hard work for you.

I am grateful these machines have made my life that much easier, it helps me in so many ways, and I feel confident my children's clothing will stay newer-looking longer, and get washed thoroughly without mom banging her head against the wall with repeated attempts. I hardly have to use pretreat sprays anymore, saving me even more money saving, cha-ching!

The only "negative" thing I have to say about the Duet® washer is that the sing-songy melody it used to emit as I'd slide the button from one option to the next no longer sings. (I know, how silly is that? That's all the negative I've got!) I'm not sure how it happened, or if I accidentally turned it off, but seriously, in our five-plus months of owning these machines, and super-using it with my huge family, that is my only negative mark. It's handled everything I've thrown at, err, in it with ease.

This set has been a dream come true. Now, if only Whirlpool would get a "folding" feature, that'd be awesome. And maybe a "put your clothes in the hamper properly" feature.

Ahem.

Disclosure: Whirlpool sent me the pedestals, but the washer and dryer we purchased ourselves. All views expressed are my own.

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

23 Week Baby Belly - The Crazy Hair Edition

2011-11-11T12:45:00.002-06:00

He or she has been busy dancin' inside. A LOT. He/she is a pretty good sleeper at night, but the second I get up to go pee? This wee one thinks it's "go" time.

"Is it time? Is it? Is it time? Can I dance now?"

DancedancedanceKICKdancedance. Sigh.

Definitely not pointy like last week.

I decided to throw-back to my early-twenties and get a little crazy-funky with my hairstyle today. Instead of wearing one, very parental, mom-type clip in the back, I separated my hair into two, and let a little fringe fly.

Food is still minorly icky. Baby is already an olympian. Mom needs to get exercising more (now that daddy's home and she has time). Otherwise, all is well.

Baby bump progression thus far:

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

6 Ways You Can Help the Military

2011-11-10T14:37:00.005-06:00

This Veteran's Day, people are looking for ways to help our military, either in acts of service, donations, or lending their support in other ways. Here's six different ways you may not have known about that you can help our military right now.

1. Give to help shelter a Vet
Homes for Our Troops helps construct homes to help severely injured veterans. You can donate your time, tools, money, or support their cause by purchasing their merchandise, for yourself or as a gift. HomesForOurTroops.org

2. Donate your old phones
What do you do with those phones that are broken, no longer work, or are out of date? Many places offer recycling programs, but here you can print out a shipping label, send it in, and the money goes towards calling cards for soldiers. cellphonesforsoldiers.com

3. Keep and send old, expired coupons
Overseas commissaries accept expired coupons up to six months old. Donate your old coupons to help a military family overseas save money! coupsfortroops.com

4. Send Care Packages & Letters for Troops & Their Families
Operation Gratitude sends over 100,000 packages to troops overseas, their families left at home, and to wounded vets seeking treatment. You can volunteer to help, send items to fill their packages, write letters to be sent, or much more. operationgratitude.com

Soldier Packages serves as the middle-man in giving you the current name and mailing address of a soldier in need of a care package currently serving overseas. soldierpackages.org

Holiday Mail for Heroes is a joint venture between the Red Cross and Pitney Bowes, currently in their fifth year, collecting cards and letters to distribute to service members, veterans, and their families. Holiday Mail for Heroes

5. Support Children of Military Families
Operation Bigs is a program created by Big Brothers Big Sisters that helps mentor and support children of military soldiers that are deployable. Operation Bigs

6. Volunteer to Send Books to Soldiers
Books for Soldiers helps match volunteers to soldiers who request reading and entertainment materials, such as CDs, DVDs, etc. BooksforSoldiers.com

Have you ever volunteered to help before? What other sites and organizations do you know about and use?

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

DIY Homemade Uncrustables Sandwiches

2011-11-09T10:53:00.003-06:00

Kids (and moms, ahem) love PB&J sandwiches. And those Smuckers Uncrustables sure are a wonderful idea in theory, except their processed, too expensive, and honestly, can be done by yourself. You can make these fresh, or ahead of time and freeze them, all with a handy-dandy little contraption called the Cut-N-Seal® by Pampered Chef.

Image courtesy of Pampered Chef

This relatively inexpensive sandwich-maker (it's only $9.50!) basically presses the two pieces of bread together, sealing along the outside into little pockets, and takes no more than 30 seconds from first press to last cut.

Once you fill your two pieces of bread with your favorite sandwich contents (I used PB&J here, but you can use anything), place the Cut-N-Seal® on top of the two pieces of bread in the middle. (We use Nature's Own All-Natural Honey Wheat bread.)

Push down as hard as you can, to press the two pieces together, like this:

I find that using a knife to make a clean cut around the edges works well. Our bread is kind-of spongy, y'know.

Peel away the leftover crusts (which are mighty tasty to snack on, might I say), and Ta-da! Your Homemade Uncrustables sandwich is complete!

You can make a bunch of these and freeze for school, too! Freezing your sandwiches will keep the contents cold for your child until lunch! This is also pretty easy enough that your children can help you make it!

Other things you can make with the Cut-N-Seal® are homemade hot pockets using crescent roll dough or bread dough, personal pies and tarts using refrigerated pie crusts, and so much more! (Check out some of Pampered Chef's recipes! My favorite is the Chicken Salad Tea Sandwich)! And you're making these creations homemade, no added gobbledegook chemicals. Neat, huh?

What do you think?

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Join Us for the Cheerios #sendCheer Twitter Party on 11/10 and Help Support #military Families

2011-11-08T13:05:00.007-06:00

If you follow me on Twitter, you may have noticed I've been tweeting and retweeting a lot about something called "#sendcheer" lately. It's a campaign I'm currently running with Collective Bias that I couldn't be more excited about. As an Army wife myself, helping military families, big or small, is something I'm quite passionate about, and this initiative is a fun and easy way to not only help support the military, but to get the kids involved while doing it. (Be sure read my post about other ways to help the military, too!)

Cheerios® has teamed up with the USO to "send cheer" to military families by sending encouragement and thanks using special postcards you can cut out from specially marked Cheerios boxes. Look!

How cool is THAT!?

Once stamped, these pre-addressed postcards will go to the USO to be distributed by them to military families. As a result, for each card received, $1 for each card will be donated by Cheerios to the USO to help fund programs that help support the military and their families. How wonderful is that? You can do all that, just for the price of a stamp, and a few words of encouragement and thanks written! Awesome!

Imagine being on the receiving end of one of these postcards! I get sniffly and teary-eyed just thinking about how much this will make a family's day, with all they military families go through, serving right alongside their soldier.

I can't help but feel pride in this campaign, as a military wife, and I am supporting this 1000%. I hope you do, too. To celebrate this campaign launch at Walmart, we're having a #sendCheer with Cheerios® Twitter Party!

Join us to chat about how we can help support military families through #sendCheer with Cheerios! We will also share great "giving back" ideas, and give away two (2) $25 Walmart gift cards, two (2) $50 Walmart gift cards, and one (1) $100 gift card to Walmart during the party. Woohoo!

WHAT: #sendCheer with Cheerios Twitter Party to "send cheer" and discuss ways to help support military families!

WHEN: Thursday, November 10th from 9 pm – 10 pm EST

WHERE: On Twitter via TweetChat or our custom Tweet Grid: http://bit.ly/tfbPC8 using the #sendCheer hashtag

FOLLOW: Follow hosts @crazyadventures, @kathleenhenage, @monicajohnson and the #sendcheer hashtag

PRIZES: 5 (Five) Walmart gift cards total to be given away: 2 $25 GCs, 2 $50 GC, and 1 $100 GC

RSVP: The link below (use your Twitter name as your name, and your Twitter profile URL as your URL, please)

Fine Print: To be eligible to win one of the five Walmart gift cards being given away, participants must RSVP using the linky below. All winners will be chosen from the RSVP list, using random.org, and must be present and participating in the party at the time that they are drawn as a winner. Only open to US residents only.

Looking forward to seeing you there! And be sure to hit the share buttons below, and share with friends, family, and various followers social media channels.

Thank you for your interest in helping Cheerios support military families! Be ready to share YOUR ways you help support from home at the Twitter party, okay?

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Kids Sleep Anywhere, The Camera Phone Edition

2011-11-08T06:00:00.015-06:00

Unbelievably enough, I've gotten all these shots with my camera phone in the last few weeks. My kids have been hard at work falling asleep anywhere, lemme tell ya!

The first two are of my Baby Dude after a long day of soccer. The poor dude came home and fell asleep standing up!

He somehow managed to roll over while standing, still asleep! (OH YES HE DID!)

Baby Sis wasn't feeling too hot. I set up the couch with blankets and towels, in case she got sick (again). She tossed and turned and eventually rolled herself up to the half-stand position (on the same couch as above).

Baby Dude fell asleep playing the Nintendo DS.

This was a text I sent to my husband while he was away. This was how I woke up one morning last week. Apparently, my kids sleep anywhere, including on one-another.

This one just melts my heart. This was late last week.

This one was over the weekend, my poor Baby Dude was so tired, he came up and hugged me, and fell asleep standing up against my baby belly.

(If you haven't noticed, my kids have a knack for this sleeping anywhere business. Check out more hilarious photos by browsing my kids sleep anywhere series!)

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

For the Love of the Win, and Not the Game

2011-11-07T09:24:00.007-06:00

It's no secret that we're a sports family. We're active folks with active children and crazy-busy lives shuffling kids to-and-fro. I know I have a lot more gray hair from it, but I feel my children are learning some wonderful life lessons from it. Mostly. Except when the referees ruin the game for them (and us).

Saturday's soccer game was a rain-out make-up game, one we were slated to play October 8th, against a team my husband had looked forward to playing, as a guy he works with had a kid on the "green team," and they'd looked forward to facing each other all season. Smack talk around the office, "You're going down, Douglas!" and the like (kidding, of course). Our unbeaten U12 team against their self-proclaimed win-some-lose-some team. However, I'd seen their team play last week, and felt they had a legitimate shot, they had some fast forwards and a decent goalkeeper. Despite our record, nothing's ever certain. I, too, looked forward to seeing the match-up.

Unfortunately, the excitement ended almost as the game began, and there were many things wrong with the game that day.

First, unbeknownst to us, it was S.A.T. weekend, and our kids now had refs that weren't trained/qualified in their age group, who didn't know all the rules. So when the green team's substitute goalkeeper flubbed her goal kick twice, and kicked it to herself? That should've been two penalty kicks for us, but no penalties were called.

The ref did eject one of their players, though, after an angry little girl with elbows a-throwin' finally tried to take a punch at my son. Yeah, my husband praised God I missed that one! I was too busy taking a toddler to the bathroom, but came in to see my son hysterical on the sidelines because of how abused they were getting on the field, with parents cheering them on to do it! And as the girl and her mother left the field, passing us? Several foul words flew out of their mouths, at my son, at our team, at the ref. And the other team continued to encourage each other to play dirty, and the ref did absolutely nothing. The other team's parents cheered their children on to hurt our children, and the refs did nothing. In fact, several times we could have had penalty kicks, and didn't, the ref simply didn't call anyone over. I was besides myself.

Cheat to win, by any means necessary, eleven- and twelve-year-olds, as declared by your parents, anyway. You know, we looked forward to playing here in San Antonio, escaping the protect-our-own mentality the locals had against us military folks at Fort Polk. It stung a great deal to see it happen here, too, where soccer costs more than double for our children to play. We paid MONEY for this?

I wish I could say my disappointment with refs ended there, but it didn't.

Another game we'd looked forward to this weekend was the Steelers-Ravens Sunday Night Football game. A rivalry always exciting to watch, even if you aren't a fan of either team. It's been hyped all week, "best rivalry in the league," and we know it first-hand, being Steelers fans. And yet, it's another disappointing game because the refs couldn't officiate their way out of a paper bag.

If you didn't watch the game, let me give you some of the "highlights" - the refs called helmet-to-helmet penalties when Steelers players committed the penalty, but not on the Ravens. Bogus penalties against us, grounded Ravens balls said were ruled "completed catches," yet ours never were, to include two "pass interference" calls when the Ravens receivers HAD CAUGHT the ball (isn't it supposed to be called when someone holds you, preventing you from catching it?!) and the suspicious game-changing "delay of penalty" against us at the end with a broken play-clock to work with.

Even the announcers, who kept replaying would-be penalties and incomplete passes, were shocked by the refs calls when they themselves were reviewing the same footage we at home were.

Folks, when did we become this "Sweep the leg, Johnny" society in which we must win at all costs? Cheat to win, by any means necessary? Don't you think we have enough corruption in our lives with our politicians, wall street/banking industry/corporate buyouts and greed? For some, this is the only relief they get from all the day-to-day corruption.

We pay good money for the NFL Sunday Ticket and satellite to sit down, as a family, to watch these games. Fans pay good money to purchase jerseys and game tickets to attend their favorite teams' games and watch. Our hard-earned money is spent to watch referees blowing calls and "fixing" the game. Refs need to start being held more accountable for their actions (or lack there-of) and start realizing what they're doing is cheating.

My kids are watching! This isn't the first horrific travesty in NFL officiating I've ever witnessed (or written about) with my children watching, either. Do you know what this shows our children who aspire to be NFL players? That no matter how hard you play, if the refs don't call the game properly, no matter how hard you try, you can and will lose. "Sweep the leg, Johnny!"

I wanted a fair game called (I always do). If a team is going to win, I want them to win on their own merits. I wanted to see these two games match-up their best with their best, and go at it and throwdown as they always do. And if the Ravens beat us, again, because they played better, without the refs assisting them in BS calls, then so be it, then they'd rightfully deserve the win. There was no doubt the first game this season they came to play and deserved that well-faught win, but this game? This game should have a big, fat asterisk (*) next to it, because to me, this wasn't a "win," this was a loss for everyone who watched, who played, who supports the NFL's wallet. And every fan, Ravens, Steelers or other, should be ashamed of the NFL for allowing it to happen unpunished. Roger Goodell better get on this officiating issue once and for all, and finally do something about these horrible refs fixing games. Maybe if the refs were fined for every bad or "missed" call, like they do with players and illegal hits, maybe then we'd get a game called fairly? What do you think?

As parents, we teach our children right from wrong, black from white, work hard, play nice, study well, and you will succeed. And then they watch stuff like this time and time again, and it's hard to continue to drill into little minds that the good guy will always win, and that cheaters never do.

I'm sorry, but having to tell my children "life isn't always fair" when the outcome should've been and could've been different just doesn't cut it for me. We, as a society, as role models for our children (who will once take over our society), need for us to do better, to be better than that, or the cycle of corruption will continue and then what the hell are we watching and participating in any of this for?

And any Ravens fan who feels last night's game was an "ass-whooping" and well-faught win is no better than the green team's parents cheering on little kids throwing elbows and cheating their way to victory. I demand better for my kids, and the kids of my friends, why don't you?

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

22 Week Baby Belly

2011-11-04T10:16:00.001-05:00

I feel "pointier" than last time, wouldn't you agree?

Kind-of like an arrow, pointing my way this way, or that way. Haha. "Where are you going, mom?"

{Sticks belly out towards the kitchen} Heh.

Today is a celebration - my husband comes home after two.long.freaking.weeks. of him being gone on Army assignment. Soccer is almost over, and I survived! We all survived! (Barely.)

I'm beginning to feel that "food is icky" feeling again. Nothing appeals to me. I think it's also a tired-of-cooking-every-meal thing, or tired-of-being-the-only-parent thing, or maybe it's a just-plain-tired thing.

Did I mention I'm tired? No? Well, then.

The kids have started playing the name game. This never leads to good things. "No, kids, we cannot name your baby brother or sister Thor. Or Dora. Or Power Ranger."

They're also taking bets as to the gender of our tie-breaker seventh child. "It's a boy, because boys are awesome!"

"Nooo! Girls are!"

And then, mom hides in a corner, plugging her ears, while the kids proceed with the "OH YES THEY ARE!" "OH NO THEY AREN'T" argument that lasts for.ev.er. {slaps forehead}

Who will win? Boy or girl? What do you think?

Baby bump progression thus far:

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Top 10 Ways to Get Grounded (Take Note, Children)

2011-11-03T15:56:00.002-05:00

Top 10 Ways to Get Grounded
by Lisa "Sick-of-It" Douglas

Make your mother repeat everything she says at least twice. She really loves repeating herself over and over.
When she threatens to "Black Bag" your room because it's continually messy, go ahead, keep leaving your dirty laundry on the floor. She loves washing three-day-old crusty underwear and stinky soccer socks.
When she tells you to play nice with your sister, and your sister aggravates you, and you attempt to throw a punch her way? Don't be surprised at how much your mother will LOVE it!
When your parents forewarn you NOT to spend all your days texting, but then they randomly check their bill to see you've texted 2600 times in a week? Yeah, that's a great job listening, there.
When your mom asks you to do your chore, and it takes you forty-five minutes to do it, because you procrastinate/have to eat/use the restroom/have a cramp, and then she practically has to beg you to get it done? That's her idea of a good 'ol time right there.
When your mother is forced to go grocery shopping by herself (because your Dad's away), and you, toddler-type person, choose to hang, push, pull, drag, get-in-the-way, touch e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g you see when she is trying to make this a quick trip, that's a GREAT way to get her to say "yes" to gum or M&Ms at check-out.
She loves it when you keep trying to finish her sentences when she's finally having an actual adult conversation. She loves your constant interruptions.
Speaking of interruptions, do your best to make as much noise as possible when she's on the phone, she loves being "that person" that has to yell while on the phone.
When she asks you to clean up after yourself in the bathroom, she loves finding toothpaste dried on the side of the sink, dirty clothes all over the floor (with the hamper two feet away) and wet towels in a pile instead of hung up.
She loves wiping up piss from you boys, who refuse to hit the toilet or lift the seat. It's so much fun for her!

(And the funny thing about each and every one of these? Had they have listened the first time (#1), this all could have been avoided!? But noooooo......)

Come on, you know you want to add to this list, too. (And leave your blog's link when you do, I'll update my list above.) So tell me, what is your children's "favorite" ways to get grounded?

Reader submissions:

11. "Interrupt mommy while she's blogging!" - Mammatalk

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Chicken Nugget Macaroni and Cheese Casserole

2011-11-02T11:00:00.002-05:00

What do you get when you pair your favorite boxed mac 'n cheese with mixed vegetables and cut-up chicken nuggets? A super easy and delicious dinner your children will devour!

It's so easy to do, even your kids can help you make it!

Chicken Nugget Macaroni and Cheese Casserole
*Please note: I did not put quantities, because I make for a family of 8 people. You can choose to make as much as you feel would feed your family, so quantities are up to you.*

Package of chicken nuggets (we use Tyson)
1-2 boxes of macaroni and cheese with ingredients needed on box (we use organic Annie's)
bag of frozen mixed vegetables
shredded cheddar (optional)

Heat your oven to 350 degrees. Boil water in a saucepan to prepare your macaroni and cheese as you normally would. Microwave your chicken nuggets on a plate for 3-4 minutes each plateful (depending upon how much you make/need). After the chicken is heated through, cut into quarters and set aside while you microwave mixed vegetables and continue to prepare the macaroni and cheese.

Once the macaroni and cheese is boiled, mixed and ready, combine everything into a sprayed baking dish, cover, and bake for 20 minutes. Uncover, sprinkle with additional shredded cheese if you like, and bake for an additional 5 minutes to brown the top a little.

Let cool a few minutes before serving. And then? Be prepared for the ooh's and ahh's and compliments galore.

Mmmm. Come to momma!

What's also awesome about this recipe? You can stock up on these ingredients and keep them on hand as a last minute meal idea if you need it in a pinch.

Another awesome tidbit? If you choose to bake your chicken nuggets in the oven (microwave them first, to get them thawed), while the macaroni and cheese is boiling and being prepared, you can avoid baking the casserole altogether, and serve on the stovetop. Simply mix it in a bowl, and serve, saving even more time. How awesome is that!?

What do you think? Do you think your kids will love this dish?

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

The Toilet Paper Analogy (and Why You Need It In Your Life)

2011-11-01T06:00:00.003-05:00

Are you the Toilet Paper Changer™ in your house, like I am? It drives me crazy, to no end, to plop my busy mom ass down on the seat, with haste, only to realize that you're out of paper, and stuck.

There are times, though, that I've found someone did me the honor of changing it when empty, before I got to it. Unfortunately, I come to find the hard way that they've done it wrong.

What's the wrong way, you ask? Check out the picture:

Image credit: CurrentConfig.com

And it's at that point, when I'm unrolling the toilet paper, recognizing it is wrong, when I realize that I have two choices: I can choose to fly off the handle (either at someone or by myself) that someone did it incorrectly, or I can choose to be thankful that it was done for me, without asking, helping me. You know, without me having to waggle my bare ass to fetch myself some from another room, or a few feet away in a cabinet, fighting my toddler to fetch it, or something embarrassing like that.

I call this the Toilet Paper Analogy.

My oldest's chore is to put away the dishes (among other things). Often times, I get agitated, because I find pots put away haphazardly, glasses stacked inappropriately, or silverware everywhere but separated properly. Or, the worst offender, all the storage containers thrown like frisbees into the cabinet. Argh! Secretly (or not-so secretly), I snarl, and get frustrated, and then I let it go. Why?

The Toilet Paper Analogy - I choose to be glad she helped me at all, and that I didn't have to do it all myself.

Watching my children fold clothes from the dryer wrong, or vacuum without noticing they didn't pick up all the crumbs, or seeing toys not stacked properly, I could be angry. Sometimes I am angry (if I've asked them nicely the right way and ended up ignored). And I do, definitely, lose my parental cool about laundry not making it in the hamper which is Only!Two!Feet!Away!From!The!Bathroom!

In our home, with as many people as we have living in it, our housework falls mostly to me, but is definitely a team effort. We all live here, so we all help here. It might not be perfect all the time, or the cleanest house you know, but it gets done, and with practice, they will learn.

And instead of choosing anger and frustration in my perfectionist mind over a job not done exactly the way I would do it, I choose the thankfulness that I had help at all.

The Toilet Paper Analogy.

(P.S. Of course, I right side up the toilet paper. And fix the haphazard things if they're at risk of falling. Secretly, of course. Ahem.)

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Halloween Schmalloween. Today is Mom's Freaking Day Off!

2011-10-31T10:47:00.000-05:00

Today might be Halloween, but other than dressing up and trading candy, today shall henceforth be known as MOM'S FREAKING DAY OFF, YO!

Friday, Saturday and Sunday were non-stop, mom's-gotta-go-go-goooo kind-of days that make me pant in exhaustion just thinking about them. I tried to stop and take a belly bump pic, but honestly? I wasn't feeling too photogenic. I didn't even want to be out in public, barely able to slap a toothbrush on my teeth or dab some deodorant on my pits. I had to shell out six freakin' bucks on a new tweezer the other day just to tame the amazon eyebrows I had going on, and dry shampoo was my new BFF.

But I did it, I survived our crazy five-kids-playing-soccer-and-homecoming weekend, as well as a full week without hubby. And even better news, he's due home in four days! (Cue the harps and angels singing!)

This isn't just the last week without hubby, though, it's the last week of soccer. I have one more full week of ushering children to practices, quickly scurrying home to throw dinner together, only to return to pick them up, slap the remaining pieces of dinner together, serve, and somehow get the kids fed, bathed, chores done and in bed at a reasonable hour without falling asleep before they do.

Yes, I totally fell asleep before the older kids did on Saturday. I was nodding off at 8:30pm, but managed to stay awake long enough to put both toddlers to sleep and text my sister-in-law, but after I laid the kids in bed and it rounded the 9:15-9:30pm mark? All bets were off, this preggo's body shut down, and I passed out like a drunken rock star on the couch, sitting up, spread eagle, droolin' like a mo fo. It wasn't pretty.

My older kids were wonderful, though - they put themselves to sleep on time. By the time my teenager called me from her friend's house to tell me she was back from Homecoming, and safe, at 11pm, all lights were off, and snoring (other than mine) could be heard from upstairs. Only then did I shuffle my ridiculously tired body off to bed with the toddlers. It was safe, now. My oldest baby was at her friends, safe, while my five others were asleep, safe. Mom's duty was done, yo.

Parenting solo with five kids in soccer and kiddie social lives is hard, man. But oh! So rewarding.

And naps? Naps are gifts from the Gods, and awesomely rewarding themselves. And after this weekend's events and this upcoming week's excitement, I can't wait for one today. Today being my self-proclaimed FREAKING DAY OFF!

Word.

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!

Welcome Home, Soldier!

2011-10-27T07:00:00.004-05:00

When you get the call, the official I'm-flying-home-today call, there are no words that could fill the emotion pouring out of your body. Every feeling that a human person has the capacity to feel explodes at once, and you feel it all, right there. Pulsating, under your skin.

The nightmarish deployment is over, and your other-half is on their way home to you. Finally!

You begin making plans of things to do, and prepare, and nervously clean things that are already clean, and realize the dumbassdom has resurfaced and you have no idea what you're doing, yet, you can't stop doing it.

You get a prospective time to arrive at the hangar, and you arrive early, even though you know that these things never start early, you can't bear to imagine your loved one stepping off the plane without you there to receive them.

It feels like hours, where body parts are randomly shaking, and tears fling out of your eyes for no reason other than excitement. And nerves.

You've made signs, and clutch them in your sweaty hands until you're tearing the corners with your grip, because these signs mean so much to you, so much to them.

When the plane comes, there are screams. There are cheers. There is applause and "YES!"'s and so many people suddenly on their feet waving, yet these planes don't have windows, but you wave anyway because they are stateside and home and you can't imagine not waving to them.

They begin to file off the plane, and you rush to get a look, but they are so far away and all look the same, in their caps and uniforms, some are taller than others but overall, you see a mass of green filing off the plane and you wonder, 'Is that them!?"

Finally, they've all deplaned, and stand at attention, all filed nice and neat and pressed yet exhausted but they won't dare stand any less straight than normal, this is their honor. Standing before you, so handsome and beautiful, you want so desperately to pluck them from their washboard-straight stance and hug them until you can't breathe, but there's a Colonel or Admiral talking, who sounds like the Charlie Brown teacher, "Wah wah wahh," who is only prolonging your embrace, but you know, despite their wanting to reach you, they are so proud for those words.

"Welcome home, soldier."

There is music, and the National Anthem, and horns and a lot of hoopla, and this official Welcome Home ceremony makes you weak in the knees, both in excitement and agitation, you just want that soldier in your arms, now! And there! There they are! Finally! Before you!

You laugh/cry out loud whenever a baby cries, or a child calls out "DAD!" because you know, That's how you feel too, pal!

Suddenly.. they're released from formation. And in almost deafening silence momentarily scares you into an eruption of movement around you, as people lunge towards the soldiers and the soldiers take off their caps with tearful smiles.

There's hardly any words, because there are just gasps. They're home. They're safe. And they're coming towards you.

And the embrace.. the embrace you've longed for, for months and months, is just as sweet and delicate and amazing and passionate as the one you dreamt about every day and night since they boarded the plane to take them into harm's way and away from you. And you never, ever want to let go, and you don't. You can't.

The kids stick like glue to their soldier, and there's a smudge of a family where individual people once stood. You are stuck together, melted into one big puddle of happiness and THANK GOODNESS DADDY IS HOME AND SAFE.

There are lots of smiles through lots and lots of tears.

Despite how pretty your makeup and hair may have looked, you've cried it all off by now. No matter how nicely dressed you may have been, all that matters is that dirty uniform pressed against that nice outfit of yours, and his hat placed on your once-nicely done hair, with his fingers combing through it, sending familiar chills up your spine.

And your child's hand is in his. And your family in the same room, in breathing proximity, once more.

Welcome home, soldier.

Dedicated to Matt and Rachael. Welcome home!

Never miss a thing! Subscribe today for all kinds of crazy parenting fun!